Because I'm spending all this weekend and most of next week/end on a major volunteer effort, and because I know you're all do-gooder liberal elites:
Do you do any volunteer work? If so, what?
Wisconsin just issued its 100,000th concealed/carry permit. The quote of the day comes from J.B. Van Hollen:
"There were doomsday people out there, before concealed carry was passed, who were predicting, of course, the doom and gloom that when we put more guns on the street, that when more people are able to carry concealed weapons, that we're going to have more problems," he said. "Nothing could have been further from the truth."
OK, maybe a fair point. I can't find statistical data out there yet that shows changes in gun-related deaths. I'm figuring this is something that might take a while to fully sort out. My only great hope is that the Journal-Sentinel decides to send the watchdog team after this and see if the bear shit in the woods. It seems like of all the officials, groups and organizations out there, only the JS's Dan Bice/Raquel Routledge all-stars manage to shine light on crap like this in any kind of effective way.
In more fun news, I've been obsessing about this for at least a week now. Watch and witness the rise of Jeff Daniels:
“I don’t want government telling me what I can do and what I can’t do — because I’m an American. But in Monongalia County, you can’t smoke a cigarette, and you can’t smoke a cigar, you can’t do anything,” Raese said.And I oppose that, because I believe in everybody’s individual freedoms, and everybody’s individual rights to do what they want to do. And I’m a conservative and that’s the way that goes.
But in Monongalia County now, I have to put a huge sticker on my buildings to say that this is a smoke-free environment. This is brought to you by the government of Monongalia County. OK?
Remember, Hitler used to put Star of David on everybody’s lapel, remember that? Same thing.
Wow, I guess that makes Mayor Bloomberg a Nazi too. Who knew? Perhaps only the Shadow, Fee Waybill and Sputnik Spooner. That means it's Tubes time:
Mitt Romney had another one of his what planet are you from moments yesterday in the Keystone State. (I love state nicknames and fling them about with abandon whenever I get the chance.) He was handed some cookies made by a local baker and, well, insulted the baked goods:
I don't know about your neck of the woods but in mine 7-Elevens don't bake cookies. It is, however, noteworthy that Mitt has actually heard of 7-Eleven. What's next? Mocking Stuckey's pecan logs? Actually those are kinda scary and eminently mockable since they look like turds...
Weird Mitt has violated rule number one of the campaign trail: if someone hands you food, pretend that it's yummy or as the Mittster himself might say delightful. The good news is that the Bethel Bakery's business is booming post Romney weirdness. I bet you $10K that If this had been anyone else but Weird Mitt nobody would have noticed...
Stay tuned for another episode in the continuing adventures of Weird Mitt and the little people...
This is very sad but not unexpected news. The great Levon Helm, drummer and vocalist for The Band, has died at the age of 71. Levon has been herocially battling a series of maladies for many years. He was one of my childhood musical heroes and always had a special place in my heart. I'm even feeling a bit verklempt right now and that's a rare thing for me, y'all.
Here's one of Levon's many signature songs:
Tea Party favorite Allen West was one of the looniest members of the GOP's class of 2010. And that's saying something. He's even mega wingnutty by the standards of Florida politics. And that's saying something. The other day he said something stupidly inflammatory even by his own standards. And that's why he's this week's poster boy for malakatude,
I'm not going into chapter and verse about his past rants, if you want to read his greatest hits, click here. His latest expedition to Bizzarro World started last week went he trotted out his inner Joe McCarthy and claimed that there were up to 80 Communists in the House of Representatives. Holy Cold War nostalgia, Batman.
Florida Rep. Allen West refused to name which of his fellow representatives were communists when pressed on the issue by CNN’s Soledad O’Brien on Thursday morning. O’Brien was following up on comments West made last week when he insisted 78 to 81 members of Congress are communists, specifically singling out the Congressional Progressive Caucus. West has since doubled down on that assertion.
“Communist, progressive, Marxist, socialist, statist … I’m looking at the ideologies,” West told to O’Brien. “I’m looking at the things they believe in and if you don’t think that we have to stand upon truth and be able to identify and clearly contrast the different principles and values and ideologies … here in this country then we’re never going to get to the fact of accepting the true debate that is happening in America. We don’t need a bureaucratic nanny state. We need to stay a constitutional republic.”
Say what? It's all incoherent gobbledygook punctuated by boilerplate wingnut sound bites. I don't think West has a clue what a communist or even a so-called constitutional republic is. Communist countries have been very fond of calling themselves republics and most of them even had constitutions. Not that West would know anything about that, he's ignorant and proud of it like so many teanuts.
One of the funniest moments of this campaign was when Sarah Palin said that West would be a fine running mate. Stupid endorsing stupid. I guess the logic is that "Obama's a black dude so we need one of our own." It would help, however, if the man were not batshit crazy. I guess Palin sees herself as the one who will pick up the pieces if the Goopers lose in the fall or that she wants Romney to have an even weirder and less qualified running mate than her. I gave up trying to decipher Palin speak a long time ago. It's also hard to read the mind of someone who's mindless...
It's hard to figure out whether Allen West is either so 2010 or so 1950, which was the year that Tailgunner Joe shot off his mouth in Wheeling, WV and claimed that the State Department was chock-full-o-commies. The difference is that McCarthy's accusations were made cynically and fueled by whiskey. West may actually believe the shit he says and that sort of delusional douchebaggery is why he's malaka of the week.
OK, a little creative license with the picture -- it's not fish with three eyes, no, the fish are either deformed or covered with lesions, as are shellfish. The shrimp have no eyes. No eye sockets either.
Also too, like First Drafter Southern Beale, I've been wondering what the hell the orange slime is. Of course, the authorities are saying no problem because it's been tested, whatever that means.
Meanwhile, the rest of the media has gone to the dogs. Literally. (Link includes audio.)
The old line about Dick Clark got trotted out again after his death was announced. I had my own variation on it: the teflon teenager. Clark was up to his neck in the payola scandal in the Fifties but skated while Alan Freed took the fall. Freed died a wrecked man at the age of 43 whereas Clark died a rich mogul at the age of 82: better to skate than be a scapegoat. Hmm, sounds like a hit to me but I somehow doubt one could dance to it...
Here's a cringeworthy exchange between Clark and Talking Heads:
In 1982 King Crimson released an elpee, Beat, which was essentially a tribute to Jack Kerouac and Neal Cassady of On The Road fame. Heartbeat is my favorite tune from that album. It features lyrics and lead vox by Adrian Belew who has one the greatest names in rock history. I'm not sure who or what he belew but I love his colorful moniker...
Not only are the secret service dudes involved in the Coulmbian prostitution scandal stupid but they're cheapskates:
The controversy arose after one of the women went back to a hotel room with two agents. The woman wanted to be paid for serving both agents, the source who has been briefed on the probe told NBC News. Instead, the agents would only agree to split her price, prompting the woman to complain to local police who were stationed in the lobby of the Hotel Caribe, the source said.
So, they wanted a two-fer. I don't know much about hookers but I know that they don't offer coupons or advertise with Groupon not even for groupon sex...
Parents need to do a far better job in helping young adults understand that the money spent on education needs to be able to be recouped in the form of a real job on the other side. Parents would also do well to explain the importance of hard work, personal responsibility, vision, personal sacrifice and minimizing the sense of entitlement.
Look, people younger than 30 aren't a different species. Young people want stuff to work. They want good jobs and to get paid well or at least fairly for them, they want some sense of security (in no small part because they've watched what has happened to their parents without it) and they want the freedom to figure out their personal lives as they see fit. This shit isn't complicated. They want what we all wanted, what we maybe all still want. And they're scared, like we were, that they won't get it.
Bitterness toward them and their supposedly unrealistic expectations has nothing to do with those expectations and everything to do with people who, having gotten the shit kicked out of them by life, have decided to turn their anger on anyone who hasn't had all hope of bettter beaten out of them with a hammer. And you know what? This chuckling condescension, this "wait till you get out in the real world, kid," isn't actually a plan or any kind of assistance whatsoever. It's not even advice. It's just smug therapy for the person saying it.
"I'm mean & I'm nasty, I'm full of abuse. I'm evil incarnate, a most sinister goose! If you think I am kind then your idea's absurd, I am a low-down stinking fowl-feathered bird!"
The book is clearly autobiographical. For more info, check out Homan's post about it.
When I posted on Sunday about Standing In The Shadows Of Motown, several commenters mentioned Joan Osborne's rendition of this song as a highlight. I quite agree:
The local NBA squad has been sold to Tom Benson, car dealer, Saints owner and professional malaka. NBA Commish David Stern has decided to bend his past rule about not allowing nickname changes when a team moves, which is how we got the Hornets, Utah got the Jazz and Memphis got the Grizzlies.
In short, the Hornets will be no more after this season and that's fine with me: I got tired of local sports guys calling them the bees and saying that the Arena was the hive. Hornets, of course, live in a nest but that sounds too birdy for our sports peeps.
Anyway, I'm in favor of reviving the name of NOLA's old minor league team, the Pelicans. I like critter names and it also represents coastal renewal and all sorts of groovy stuff. Do any of y'all have any ideas of a more NOLA-centric name for our hoops team?
Comedian/faux economist Arthur Laffer, who has been wrong about everything since forever, is making shit up to Tennessee's House-Senate Fiscal Review Committee, because he's a serial liar and an asshole. That can be the only explanation for this comment he made as he lobbied for a repeal of the state's inheritance and estate tax:
At one point, in response to a question about the economic impact on the state of repealing the inheritance tax, Laffer said: "I spent about two hours with Fred Smith three days ago up in Memphis, and he said he's gettin' out of this state if it doesn't happen. And now we don't want to lose FedEx. Fred Smith's a couple of classes behind me at Yale and he's a good friend."
NASHVILLE -- FedEx President, Chairman and CEO Fred Smith said today that economist Arthur Laffer must have misunderstood him last week in Memphis because Smith said he's "never taken a position" on Tennessee's estate tax and has no plans to leave Tennessee.
Jesus, Arthur Laffer is a fucking buffoon. If I were Fred Smith I'd clock him in his ear next time I saw him. You don't just make shit up about people, especially not when you're appearing in an official capacity like a state legislative committee. Mind you, this bit about Fred Smith came after Laffer dropped names like "Ronald Reagan" and "Howard Jarvis." We've all had co-workers like him, self-promoters who tell stories about all the important people they hang with. Yeah, sure, and Fred Smith told you he's not just going to leave the state over the inheritance tax, but that he's moving his entire company! This made sense to people? Seriously?
It's almost funny, in a sad sort of way. Laffer's ridiculous economic theory that lower taxes create more revenue has been debunked a thousand ways to Thursday, but how precious that he has to fabricate a story about a rich buddy to illustrate his cherished point: that removing a tax won't hurt Tennessee revenues as much as keeping it does.
Laffer has less credibility than a two-headed quarter; only in Tennessee would anyone even give him the time of day. I'm sure he was thinking, "Well, somebody, somewhere is gonna leave the state over taxes! Might as well be Fred Smith! People have heard of him!"
Sure, because that's the lie these assholes cling to, isn't it? Corporations will leave America if we don't cut their taxes! FedEx is leaving Tennessee ... over the inheritance tax! Really? Where the hell would they go? Somalia? North Dakota?
God I am so sick of Republicans just making shit up. The incredible hubris it takes to think you can just make up a story and assume no one will bother to check on it, you just gotta wonder: is it intentional? After all, this story about Fred Smith went all over the news wires. I wonder how many of them will run a correction? The Commercial Appeal did - - they had to. Memphis is FedEx's home town. Will the Wall Street Journal? Politico?
There have been quite a few live or hot mic gaffes in the American presidential election. In France, a minor candidate had a thin or hot wall moment:
One moment of light relief came when rank outsider Nicolas Dupont-Aignan discovered his campaign headquarters was not as soundproof as he might have wished after noisy neighbours engaging in what the French press described as "bedroom sport" interrupted a press conference.
"Enough talk, we want actions," continued the candidate, pretending not to notice, as journalists sniggered.
Tommy Robinson took a few seconds on Sunday evening to make an observation about Twitter's homepage. "Welcome to twitter homepage has a picture of a mosque," he wrote. "What a joke #creepingsharia." Of course, Robinson isn't just any old tweeter, but the co-founder of the English Defence League, a far-right protest group. Tweet posted, Robinson no doubt wandered off to do other Sunday evening things; maybe plan a rally or two.
In less than 24 hours, #creepingsharia was trending, but what could have become a feed for EDL members and sympathisers to display their hard-hitting "evidence" of the rampant Islamisation of Britain, instead attracted the nimble fingers of sensible and funny tweeters, wittily but firmly telling Robinson and others of his ilk where to shove their ill-informed views.
From the mind of @microcuts_22: "I skipped breakfast this morning. Clearly fasting subconsciously. #CreepingSharia" and from @knownasbowman: "Muslamic bloke walked past on tiptoes #creepingsharia." From @LorrieHearts came: "Got rained on the other day, so pulled my scarf up over my head before realising that I'd become a victim of #creepingsharia." Each one a gentle squeeze of the hand, a tiny bit of silliness to ward off the insanity, and a quiet rebuke to the dangerous rhetoric being spouted by organisations like the EDL.
The cherry on this sundae? The image which prompted Robinson's original Tweet was not of a mosque but India's famed Taj Mahal. Woopsies.
I got a big laugh out of the #creepingsharia hashtag. Sometimes we forget that the ignorant exremists of the conservative fringe are not unique to the U.S. but are an international phenomenon. The trial of Norwegian murderer Anders Behring Breivik is a reminder of how dangerous this hatred is: Breivik claims his victims were not innocent teenagers, no, "these were young people who worked to actively uphold multicultural values," he told the court. That was their crime, in his twisted mind.
So yes, I realize this is serious business, and I'm not trying to trivialize it. But sometimes the best offense is a liberal helping of ridicule. Applied generously and frequently, humor is the most effective antidote to fear I know. It's hard to be scared of a boogeyman when everyone is pointing and laughing at the folks hollering about "creeping sharia." Jon Stewart and Stephen Colbert are effective neutralizers of right-wing messaging, but we're all just as clever as those guys, right?
And good grief, it's not like the right wing nutballs aren't giving us plenty of material, folks. Victoria Jackson's best comedy has been in her new self-appointed role as "citizen journalist." Here she is tiptoeing around the Murfreesboro, TN Islamic Center yesterday, peering in windows and looking for something -- anything -- scary. “It says take your shoes off and put them in the racks,” she reports. Oooh! Creeping Sharia indeed. Jackson was never this funny on SNL, folks.
So my challenge to everyone on the left this week is to use their creative energies for a little coordinated, well-executed mockery. Make 'em laugh -- it's better than crying.
I've missed my boy Silvio but he's back in the news with this corker of a headline from the BBC:
Italian ex-PM Silvio Berlusconi hosted 'nun-strippers'
I'm having nun of that, y'all...
The rough and tumble world of Sixties advertising got rougher and more tumbly on Mad Men last night. Fisticuffs broke out in the SCDP conference room and the winnah and new champeen is the usually mild mannered Lane Pryce who kicked Pete Campbell's ass. It was most satisfying as was the entire episode, which was a string of humiliations for the twerp who is unworthy of Trudy.
The fisticuffs were the result of Lane's attempt to line up the Jaguar account via his new BFF (British friend forever) a cheerfully tweedy chap named Edwin. Toodle pip, Edwin. After Lane's meeting with the Jaguar mogul did not close the deal, Pete, Roger and Don took Edwin out for a night on the town, ending up a in high class bordello, which is how Tweedy Jaguar man wound up with chewing gum on his pubis. Purt near the best line in Mad Men history.
Both Pete and Lane suffered a string of humiliations but my reaction to their woes was different. Pete is an insufferable pompous ass so his trials and tribulations had me cackling whereas Lane's woes made me want to brew him a nice cuppa and tell him to recover his stuff upper lip. The scene between the newly macho Lane and Joan was also a keeper. Lane slipped her a kiss and her response to open the door and tell him that everyone was thrilled that Pete got knocked flat on his ass. What a broad.
The whorehouse scene was also noteworthy for Don's declining to "date" any of the high class talent. Why? Don is suddenly uxorious and told Pete that the latter should count his blessings instead of sleeping around like Double D used to do. Don remains on the fidelity wagon and is also a bit sweet on Trudy but who isn't?
The return of Ken Cosgrove, scribbler, was another high point. The subject of the tow headed preppie's literary inclinations hasn't come up in quite some time but he's been writing fantasy and sci-fi stories under a pen name. Hmm, I wonder if Ben Hargrove is the one who *really* created Game of Dorks' Tyrian? He was, after all, a short story writer as well as a bit of an imp. <rim shot> Consgrove was among those at SCDP who would have helped Lane kick Pete's whiny little ass since the latter ratted him out to Roger the Sterling Silver Tongued Devil. Roger warned Kenny to drop the robot shtick and stick to his job. Cosgrove's response was to change pen names and genres. Attaboy, Mr. Algonquin.
In honor of Ken and Roger, here's Kris Kristofferson with a tune that could be retitled The Silver Tongued Devil and I, Robot:
I've been trying to write about this for weeks:
A major anti-abortion group has expanded its scope beyond abortion clinics to include protests against in vitro fertilization clinics.
Lesbian Dem Hilary Rosen tells Ann Romney she never worked a day in her life. Unlike Rosen, who had to adopt kids, Ann raised 5 of her own.
He told the science and fertility experts in his audience to resist "the fascination of the technology of artificial fertility. Benedict cautioned the experts against "easy income, or even worse, the arrogance of taking the place of the Creator," an attitude he indicated underlies the field of artificial procreation.
Arrogant is telling women that a trans-vaginal ultrasound is no big deal.
Arrogant is telling women desperate for a child that they are killing babies, are no better than murderers.
Arrogant is outlawing a procedure that could save the life or health of a woman because some other woman somewhere might misuse it.
Arrogant is telling those who adopt that they're not really parents. Arrogant is telling women, telling men, telling families that however they're doing it, they're doing it wrong.
Arrogant is using anecdotes and outliers as data by which to make laws that hurt all women, even those who want children, and are trying as hard as they can to have them.
Arrogant is assuming that those who say those things have no children, cousins, relatives, who are locked in this desperate struggle with their own bodies, who are listening to this uninformed, bigoted, cruel rhetoric and wondering, would you believe differently, if you knew you were talking about me?
Well, boys and girls, looks like Jim Rob has roused himself from his slug-like torpor and rolled to the top of Mount Olympus to rhrow thunderbolts and rage at the trembling denizens of Freeperville.
All you teabaggers - this is what your movement has wrought. The people who actually hold power on the right side of the aisle have kicked you to the curb like the febrile fringe element you are.
Daddy was quite happy to let you sit in the driveway and pretend to steer - but your attempt to suddenly try and grab the wheel while Daddy is driving down the street has been met with a cuff to the side of the head, and a gruff warning about what will happen to your sorry asses if you ever try that again.
And Jim Rob is going to pack his things in his pillowcase and run away and you'll all be sorry then, see if you won't!
Posted on Wednesday, April 11, 2012 10:04:00 PM by Jim Robinson
Notice: Free Republic has been in full rebellion mode since 2008 and will remain in full rebellion mode for the duration!
No more Doles!! No more McCains!!
No more RINOS!!
No more pencils, no more books....
Sorry - I just looked, and he's still there. Nice try, though.
Those who cannot stomach rebellion might as well start looking for a new home on the net!!
"I may even ban myself!"
Those who have ignored my hundreds of posts on this crucial issue or who have doubted me these last three or four years might as well get used to it. FR will never support the abortionist, homosexualist, socialist, mandate loving, constitution trampling liar Mitt Romney.
"Also, I'll be holding my breath until you turn blue. So there."
In case you haven't noticed, a TEA Party rebellion is on and Free Republic signed on years ago. There is no turning back. No more crap from the GOP-e!! They've screwed us for the last time!!
Ah - but weren't you just asking for it? I mean - just look at the way you guys were dressed!
Karl Rove and Mitt Romney, et al, loathe conservatism and loathe the tea party and took it upon themselves to use their money and connections to destroy nearly every one of our conservative tea party candidates while pushing their big government RINOS.
Well, if you hadn't been fellating Karl Rove and his ilk with such gusto eight years ago, your words might have some credence.
But you were, so they don't.
That makes them the enemy. I will not reward that betrayal by giving them my support or my vote.
FR is and will remain a pro-life, pro-limited government conservative site!!
There will, however, be unlimited Freepathons!
We are beholden to NO ONE!! We bow to no kings!! We bow to NO RINOS!!
I'd rather fight and die like a man than bend over and be screwed by a RINO!! I refuse to kiss Karl Rove or Mitt Romney's rings!! They can kiss my rosy red ass instead!!
"Unless, of course, they give me a photo op."
Long live the rebellion!!
Hope my message is clear.
To: Jim RobinsonCOUNT ME IN JIM!
Gonna go over to the donate page and double this month's monthly.
We have an opportunity to make history -- let's not miss it!!
(Be right back....)
To: Jim Robinson
but, but, Ann Coulter says he is a conservative..../sarcJimbo - are you gonna let him talk about your transexual girlfriend that way? She who once gave you a handjob in your own kitchen?To: mamelukesabre
Rove and his pals didn’t lift a finger to support any of our tea party candidates in 2010
That's because you were tools that have served their purpose and are now expendable.
in fact went way out of their way to torpedo many of them. FOX news, too.
Up yours Karl Rove!! Up yours GOP-e!!
The Romney camp's attempt at political jiu jitsu on the war on women may have blown up in their faces because of the candidate's tendency to lie and make flippy floppy;
“I wanted to increase the work requirement,” said Romney in New Hampshire. “I said, for instance, that even if you have a child 2 years of age, you need to go to work. And people said, ‘Well that’s heartless.’ And I said, ‘No, no, I’m willing to spend more giving day care to allow those parents to go back to work. It’ll cost the state more providing that daycare, but I want the individuals to have the dignity of work."
So, let me get this straight. It's okay for 1 percenter Ann Romney to be a homemaker but poor women gotta flip burgers? Guess that makes Mrs. Haircut undignified or something or merely another symbol of her husband's vacuous, sleazy and belief free campaign. Perhaps she can find a gig as an automotive elevator attendant; sounds pretty bloody dignified to me, y'all...
ZOMG DID OBAMA PAY FOR SECRET SERVICE H0RS? [Fox link]
Put together, the allegations were an embarrassment for an American president on foreign soil and threatened to upend White House efforts to keep his trip focused squarely on boosting economic ties with fast-growing Latin America. Obama was holding two days of meetings at the Summit of the Americas with leaders from across the vast region before heading back to Washington Sunday night.
The Secret Service did not disclose the nature of the misconduct. The Associated Press confirmed on Friday that it involved prostitutes.
The White House said Obama had been briefed about the incidents but would not comment on his reaction.
"The president does have full confidence in the United States Secret Service," presidential spokesman Jay Carney said when asked.
Oh for fuck's sake, what was he supposed to say? "Look, a lot of people work for me, so by the law of large numbers some of them are going to be complete morons. How the fuck do you get caught hiring a hooker in fucking Colombia? How stupid do you have to be? I mean, on the one hand, let's be grateful it was adult women with professional backgrounds in this sort of thing and not, say, little boys or furries or people on trapezes or some congressman's barely-legal daughter in the Lincoln bedroom, but come on, how dumb? I didn't fire them because they fucked around with hookers. I fired them because I don't want nobody working for me is too stone-cold ignorant to know you don't take the hooker to a hotel where you have to leave ID!"
I'd never seen the fabulous documentary, Standing In The Shadows Of Motown until yesterday. It's about the band behind the Motown sound, the Funk Brothers. It's a great tribute to great group of musicians and human beings. Here they are with Chaka Khan doing the Marvin Gaye classic: