First Draft

Odds & Sods: Sweater Vest Sweep Edition

Sweater Vest Sweep: Former Senator Man Dog Sex kicked some ass Tuesday. He didn't win a lot of delegates because of the goofy way the GOP allots them but Mitt has got Santorum sized shoe prints on his forehead.

I don't think it's that ex-Senator Sweater Vest is suddenly popular, it's that nobody likes Mitt and the more they see the less they like him. Hell, he lost 2 states that he won in 2008 and Colorado has a substantial LDS population. Plus, he had Tpaw's support and finished third in Minnesota, which is not something that should happen to an "inevitable nominee" at this stage of the campaign. Time for Mitt to open his wallet again and rain money on some state so he can win one.

Finally, whassup with sweater vests? I've never worn one and never wanted to. A sweater vest coulda made Steve McQueen look dorky and Rick Santorum is no Steve McQueen. Hell, he's barely even J Danforth Quayle...

Fuck yeah, 9th Circuit: They threw out California's loathsome Prop-8 on narrow grounds BUT with language that could lead to gay marriage bans being, uh, banned. The opinion was aimed smack dab at Justice Anthony Kennedy who wrote the last big gay rights case to come before the Supremes: Lawrence v. Texas. He's been trending to the right the last few years but this case could have him list leftward if, that is, the Supremes grant cert. For a more informed view, read Dahlia Lithwick at Slate.

Occupy PAN: Finally, a bit of NOLA Carnival chatter. The satirical bad asses of Carnival, Krewe du Vieux, rolled last weekend. But my sub-krewe, PAN, did not parade for reasons too lengthy and absurd to go into in any detail. It boiled down to most of us wishing to elect new leadership and the current leader's refusal to call a vote, which led to our suspension. Dissident PAN members decided to set up camp on the parade route and wear costumes from past parades. Our theme was Occupy PAN. Some pictures can be seen at my facebook page but here's one of our postery, buttony things:

Odds & Sods

I'm in for yet another week from h-e-double hockey sticks so I thought I'd go the quick blurb route. I also decided to pander to all the ice people out there by making a hockey reference. Guess I'm still capable of some puckishness.

The No Harbaugh Bowl Blues: I was pulling for the Harbaugh brother coached Ravens and Niners yesterday and we know how that went. I didn't watch either game but it sounded like the heartbreak of psoriasis for those who did since nobody but their own fans root for either the Foxboro Bradys or the Jersey Elis. The good news is that I can skip the Stupor Bowl this year.

NOLA Crime Report: Murder and mayhem are off to a fast start in 2012. It usually doesn't heat up until it, uh, heats up. BUT the crime on everyone's mind was the wasted Bama fan who teabagged a wasted LSU fan after the BCS Championship. I nearly made the aforementioned teabagger, Brian Downing, malaka of the week but the story moved too fast: it broke in Deadspin a week after the game and within a few days the Tide teabagger was identified and surrendered to the NOPD. He's charged with sexual battery, gross malakatude and egregious idiocy. Me, I was just relieved that it wasn't the Brian Downing who played for the ChiSox, Angels and Rangers back in the day.

One may be able to get away with murder in the Crescent City but not dragging one's microscopic sized testicles across a drunk's face. We have standards in NOLA albeit low ones...

If you want to see the notorious video follow this link to Deadspin.

Why Is Anyone Shocked? There's some consternation around the interwebs over Aerosmith's Steven Tyler's rendition of the national anthem before the Foxboro Bradys game. Tyler sounded like he was being strangled with one of his own scarves, which is how he *always* sounds.

Newtmentum: Finally, a political note. In the immortal words of Mitt Haircut I was delighted by his loss and Newt's win. Like Bill Clinton, Barack Obama is lucky in his enemies but who thought it would be the same enemy? Newt has been wildly unpopular for at least 15 years and only has a shot at this thing because the GOP has a bad case of rabies. It's time for Mittbot to reboot in the wake of these Newtastic developments. Btw, there's a great piece online by the author of Nixonland, Rick Perlstein, about *why* Mitt Romney became such a slippery, unprincipled douchebag: it's because his father was too candid and too principled.

One mo thang: thanks, South Carolina.

The long arm of the law, in your uterus

I feel more empowered already.

"Today's ruling is a victory for all who stand in defense of life. Every life lost to abortion is a tragedy, and this important sonogram legislation ensures that every Texas woman seeking an abortion has all the facts about the life she is carrying, and understands the devastating impact of such a life-ending decision. We will continue to fight any attempt to limit our state's laws that value and protect the unborn."

We will, however, continue to dismantle and destroy those laws and systems that value and protect living children. Once they're born, those little suckers are on their own

Deep iCrime Wave Thought

We've all gotten used to seeing people doing remarkably stupid things with their smart phones. Criminals have noticed so the latest NOLA crime wave is a high tech variation on the old snatch and grab: there has been a wave of smart phone robberies/muggings in the last few months. Some of them have even happened in broad daylight on busy streets. I wondered if we were on the cutting edge of this trend but it seems to be commonplace in big cities around the globe.

So, the next time you're walking down the street texting or tweeting just remember to pay attention so some bozo won't snatch your device. In short, be smart when using your smart phone because muggers have the hots for the smarts:

 

Assets, not liabilities

Merry Christmas everyone!

Having served various administrations, we know that politicians of both parties love this country and want to keep it safe. But right now some in Congress are all too willing to undermine our ideals in the name of fighting terrorism. They should remember that American ideals are assets, not liabilities.

You may know that, General.  Me, I'm not so sure anymore.

Gay rights are human rights

 

 

Conservatives, of course, beg to differ

 

 

You say food product, I say torture

More fatuousness from the same dipshits who think that pizza and ketchup are veggies:

On Monday night, O’Reilly Factor host Bill O’Reilly and Fox News host Megyn Kelly sat down to discuss what really happened at UC Davis on Friday and whether campus police acted appropriately in showering a group of sitting students with pepper spray. Their conclusion? No big deal.

“Pepper spray, that just burns your eyes, right?” O’Reilly asked Kelly.

“Right,” Kelly said. “I mean, its like a derivative of actual pepper. It’s a food product, essentially.”

Exactly! Like jalapeno poppers, or queso dip. Delicious. In fact, pepper spray is about 1,000 times hotter than a jalapeno, Mother Jones reports.

I tend to think of myself as hard bitten, cynical and unshockable but the pepper spray cop episode actually shocked me. It was so gratuitous and unnecessary. If pepper spray is a "food product" why isn't it ever used as such? How fucking stupid do they think we are? Oh, that's right it's Bill-O so he has reason to think that his viewers are dumber than a bag of hammers and might just use pepper spray on their vittles.

The other thing that amazes me about the pepper spray episode is that almost *everyone* has a camera phone that can shoot blurry videos. Cruel, gratuitous *and* stupid. Let's call the whole thing off:

 

Odds & Sods

We're awaiting the sort of cold front in NOLA that most of y'all would sneer at but I'm looking forward to some cool Northern air. On to today's menu of items, hopefully they'll be properly seasoned:

Worst legal advice ever: I have no idea WTF Jerry Sandusky's mouthpiece was thinking when they granted Bob Costas of NBC an interview. Did they expect softball questions because they're only familiar with my countryman's work as an Olympics host? Wrong. I thought Bob nailed him and Sandusky's responses were classic pedophile answers. He performed a modified limited hangout (sorry for the image in this context) and stressed how much he liked children. Yikes. Sandusky's lawyer should stop horsing around and give him an adequate defense so Coach Perv's seemingly inevitable conviction won't be reversed on appeal.

Cell Phone Blues: I love my smart phone BUT they seem to bring out the big stupid in people. There's a woman who is always on her phone when she gets on the bus and today she dropped it and then berated the bus driver for pulling out too fast. His reply: "I always do that." She whined a bit, picked up her phone and proceeded to have a very intimate and loud conversation about some relative's health.

The other day I saw a woman riding a bike on Magazine, which is a narrow but very busy street. She was wearing a short skirt and flip flops *and* she was smoking a cigarette and texting whilst she rode. I halfway expected to see a fatal accident but did not. I hope that text or tweet was vital but somehow doubt it. It was multi-tasking at its most imbecilic...

Paragraph of the day: It comes from the sublime Mary Elizabeth Williams at Salon in a post about the Hoaxidate and pizza:

“The more toppings a man has on his pizza, I believe the more manly he is,” he explained. “Because the more manly man is not afraid of abundance. A manly man don’t want it piled high with vegetables! ” [Side note: America, if you ever elect a man with such appalling grammar to its highest office, wild packs of copy editors with nothing left to lose are going to storm the White House and burn it down.] Cain then explained that a real man would dismiss any pizza contaminated with vegetables as “a sissy pizza.” Because Herman Cain’s penis isn’t having it!

Hmm, I wonder if Godfather's ever had horse's head or "Luca Brasi sleeps with the fishes" pizza? That would surely be butch enough for the Hoaxidate...

Odds & Sods: Ick Factor Edition

It was a busy news day yesterday and many of the top stories went beyond cringeworthy into pure ickiness.

--> Women who have been groped, harassed and crudely propositioned by Herman Cain are sprouting like mushrooms after a monsoon. The latest accusation is the ickiest and it goes well beyond sexual harassment into the realm of sexual assault. Cain's hold on wingnuttia's imagination had been ebbing for days but he still has the hardcore misogynists like Rushbo on his side. What was described by Ms. Bialek was an assault, which is an unwanted touching of any kind. I wonder if the Hoaxidate has learned to keep his hands to himself. Probably not.

--> I wrote about the uplifting side of college football yesterday as the Penn State perv case unfolded. It's such an icky story that I ended up in a rare serious conversation on Twitter about it. Our conclusion was that Penn State is the Catholic Church of the NCAA. It's a good analogy since Joe Paterno has been called the Pope more than once over the years. It's time for him to go. I bet Pope Benny could find a spot for him...

---> On a *somewhat* less icky note, I saw Jack Abramoff on 60 Minutes. I don't buy Casino Jack's contrition for a nano-second BUT I now understand the secret of his success. The man could sell ice to the Inuits and synthesizes sincerity with the best of them.

---> Finally, let's move into the celebrity ickiness zone. Director Bret Ratner is well known for making "blow stuff up movies" and his latest popcorn flick, Tower Heist is a hit. Ratner harshed his own buzz by saying "rehearsing is for fags." Ratner later apologized but this has got to be the dumbest slur ever. I have no idea what the hell it means since manly directors have been known to rehearse too.

The Fuck You Doctrine Continues

Jude sent this over:

The Wisconsin state Senate has passed a Republican-backed bill that would allow people suing the state or a state employee to pick where the case would be heard.

Current law requires all cases against the state, as well as their appeals, to be heard in Dane County unless specifically authorized by law to be somewhere else.

Republicans have long argued that judges in Dane County are too liberal.

Not sure how the judiciary in other parts of the state should take the notion that they are automatically Republican Party hacks. This reminds me of nothing so much as out-of-town pols telling those of us in the Midwest that we live in "the Heartland," by which they mean we are simpleminded hicks who can be bought off with some Christianity and pie.

I don't care where you went to college, you don't get to punch your grown-up card without learning what condescension sounds like, and these people swaggering into my courtroom because they'd heard I was a soft touch for their particular brand of nastiness would, even if I agreed with them, get my back up. You want somebody's favor, you earn it, mofo. Acting any other way is asking for trouble.

A.

 

Frank Kameny, big damn hero

In Washington, DC yesterday, a man named Frank Kameny died quietly at home. He was 86. Fittingly enough, Kameny's death happened on National Coming Out Day, something we've been celebrating since 1988, when it was created to commemorate the great 1987 March on Washington, that October day when a quarter-million LGBT citizens came to their nation's capitol to remind the rest of the country that they too were Americans and wouldn't accept being treated as anything less. That such an event took place at all, that we still celebrate it nearly a quarter of a century later, that more people than ever before are out, that DADT is history now, that same-sex marriage is a reality—none of these things could have happened if pioneers like Frank Kameny hadn't paved the way for us.

"Hero" doesn't  seem big enough somehow to describe what Kameny was, what he accomplished, what he risked, but he was a hero and much more. He was out, proud, and fighting for his civil rights during times when it was truly dangerous, when doing so could get you fired, jailed, publicly shamed. All that and more happened to Kameny but he chose not to accept it.

That 1987 march was actually the second GLBT march on Washington, but decades before either, years before even the Stonewall Riots, Frank Kameny started fighting back. His career as an activist began in 1957, after he was fired for being gay.

Kameny, a WWII veteran, earned a PhD in astronomy from Harvard, taught for a year, then became a federal employee in 1957, working for the U.S. Army Map Service in DC. Not only was he fired within a year for being gay, he was (as was customary at the time) banned from from future federal employment. He appealed his termination all the way to the U.S. Supreme Court, which declined to hear the case.

In 1965, Kameny was an organizer of the first-ever gay and lesbian protest at the White House to draw attention to government discrimination against homosexuals. Another LGBT pioneer, Jack Nichols, describes the event.

As we marched, I looked about at our well-dressed little band. Kameny had insisted that we seven men must wear suits and ties, and the women, dresses and heels. New Yorkers later complained that we Washingtonians looked like a convention of undertakers, but given the temper of the times, Kameny's insistence was apropos. "If you're asking for equal employment rights," he intoned, "look employable!" In the staid nation's capital, dressing for the occasion was, in spite of New York critics, proper.

We paraded in a small circle. Behind lampposts stood unknown persons photographing us. Were they government agents? Perrin and Otto wore sunglasses so absolute identification would be difficult should they fall prey to security investigations. We walked for an hour that passed, as I'd predicted, without incident. A few tourists gawked and there were one or two snickers, more from confusion than from prejudice.

We'd hoped for more publicity than we got. Only The Afro-American carried a small item about what we'd done. But we'd done it, and that was what mattered. We'd stood up against the power structure, putting our bodies on the line. Nothing had happened except that we'd been galvanized, and, to a certain extent, immunized against fear."

 Forty-four years later, Kameny was present in the Oval Office as President Obama signed a memorandum extending (limited) federal benefits to partners of gay federal employees.

 

NOLA Signage

There's a lively controversy in Uptown New Orleans over an anti-Obama sign some right wing malaka has put up at his house. The local news led with a false dichotomy last night: is this offensive or free speech?  It's both: there's a lot of stuff that offends me but I don't call for it to be banned unless it involves the mythical guy yelling fire in a crowded theatre.

It's not easy being a Hugo Black-style First Amendment absolutist nowadays but that's what I am. There's lots of annoying shit out there but if we want to remain a semi-free country we just gotta roll with the punches.

Okey doke, here's the tacky signage posted by an idiot on private property. Let's call it stupid but protected speech:

Sweet Home Alabama

Those zany Alabamians are at it again. Here's my old acquaintance Jonathan Turley's take on it:

In Bay Minette, Alabama, felons are being given the opportunity to climb the wall. Not the prison wall, mind you. The Alabama court and local police are helping felons over the wall of separation of church and state by giving convicted citizens an opportunity to avoid jail if they volunteer — so long as it is with a church.

Non-violent offenders with misdemeanor convictions are given a list of local churches unless they want to wait in jail and pay a fine. The constitutional problems are magnified by the absence of anything other than churches as an alternative to jail.

Town police chief Mike Rowland insists that this will save the city $75 per day to jail citizens and is based on the consensus of “all the pastors that at the core of the crime problem was the erosion of family values and morals. We have children raising children and parents not instilling values in young people.”

To help Rowland make the case for an entanglement challenge, Rev. Robert Gates added You show me somebody who falls in love with Jesus, and I’ll show you a person who won’t be a problem to society.”

Of course, in addition to the absence of secular options, no mosques or synagogues are listed.

It will be interesting how much of that $75 per day savings will be spent on the litigation over this unconstitutional program.

Elegy for Troy Davis

There are days when I'm proud to be an American and then there are days like yesterday. I dislike the death penalty because of its finality.  Once the switch is flicked, the poison injected or the trap door on the gallows sprung, it's over, a life is taken and society has its vengeance, which far too many confuse with justice.

The Troy Davis case was very troublesome because of the recantation of 7 of 9 eyewitnesses and the lack of physical evidence. It's also troublesome because it shows how hard it is to overturn a death sentence. I recall studying this issue in law school and being horrified at the standard of proof required to admit new evidence in any case. It *should* be hard to overturn a conviction BUT when someone's life is at stake, the state should proceed with caution. They don't because that would look soft even if it involved commuting a death sentence to life. That's the minimum that should have happened in the Davis case.

I live in the death penalty belt. But Louisiana didn't have an excecution between 2002 and 2010. There seems to have been a covert moratorium under Governors Foster and Blanco; possibly because of the influence of the Catholic Church. Hey, even they get some things right. There has been only 1 execution under Jindal but his raging ambition assures that there will be more. How could he face his Presidential candidate, Rick (Hang 'em High) Perry otherwise?

The oddest thing about the capital punishment debate is that conservatives regard the criminal justice system and the military as the only parts of guvmint that ever work. I don't get it: like every other human institution they're flawed and fallible. The same people that vilify the Fed and the "welfare state," believe that the police only arrest the guilty and that only the wicked are punished. If that were true, Dick Cheney wouldn't still be on the loose.

Finally, I know this isn't a proper elegy: I write prose, not poetry. But the word fits my mood today. At the very least an irreversible mistake has been made and, at the worst, an innocent man was killed by the state of Georgia. If the state is going to kill someone, it should be bloody well sure they're guilty.

Don't Ask, Don't Tell Ends Today

And I hope, soon, so will injustices like this:

In general, same-sex partners will not get the same benefits that the Pentagon grants to heterosexual married couples to ease the costs of medical care, travel, housing and other living expenses. The Pentagon says the 1996 federal Defense of Marriage Act — which defines marriage as a legal union between a man and woman — precludes extending those benefits to gay couples, even if they are married legally in certain states.

Same-sex partners can be listed as the person to be notified in case a service member is killed or injured, but current regulations prevent anyone other than immediate family — not same-sex spouses — from learning the details of the death.

A.

Ruth Bader Ginsburg: Badass

I'm 78 years old and am whipping cancer's ass. Let me at that airplane slide!

A.

"Exiled as a 'Security' Threat, Former Orland Man May Soon Return"

I broke this story when I was still reporting for the Daily Southtown, eight years ago. As part of a 9/11 retrospective I was asked to look in on the case, and this was the update:

A suburban Chicago Muslim leader exiled from the United States after 9/11 could be back as early as this fall after a federal judge declared the government's argument for keeping him away "totally asinine."

Sabri Samirah, formerly of Orland Park, has spent the past eight years in his native Jordan. In 2003, he traveled there to visit his sick mother and on his way back was stopped by immigration authorities, informed he was a "national security risk" and barred from returning to America.

Today, his lawyer is negotiating the terms of his return to America. Samirah is hopeful he will be back before the end of the year.

A.

 

This gives a whole new meaning to the term finger food

This Metry court case is an oldie but goodie:

A Metairie woman who found a small slice of a cook's fingertip in her salad seven years ago has failed to convince a Jefferson Parish jury that she deserves compensation for the psychological harm she says she has endured. Mary Deal Chambers-Johnson, 54, claims she has suffered from Post Traumatic Stress Disorder and other psychological disorders since June 25, 2004, when she found the piece of skin with a sliver of fingernail attached to it in the chicken salad she purchased for lunch from the Applebee's on Clearview Parkway in Elmwood.

"I was upset, totally distraught," Chambers-Johnson testified during a civil trial in 24th Judicial District Judge Lee Faulkner's court last week. "I feel like that's nothing you find in your food."

She sued a year later, seeking more than $89,000 in damages, including about $17,000 in doctors' bills. But the jury deliberated about three hours Friday in finding that Southern River Restaurants, which owns the Applebee's franchise, and two of its managers were not negligent. As such, the jury found that Chambers-Johnson was not entitled to a monetary award.

According to court filings, a cook, Anthony Walker, was preparing Chambers-Johnson's salad when the knife "slipped," and he cut off the tip of his finger. As Walker tended to his injury, another cook stepped in, cleaned the work station and continued with Johnson's order. The flesh and fingernail somehow got past the second cook.

Chambers-Johnson, who ordered the salad to go, said she nibbled on a piece of chicken as she drove back to her workplace. There, she found the skin and fingernail with some blood. Her attorney, Michael Darnell, kept the fingertip in a freezer, but the jury only saw photographs of it.

David Groome, attorney for the restaurant, called it an unfortunate accident that brought unwanted publicity to the company. He accused Chambers-Johnson of ignoring the company's attempts to rectify the matter and of "running into court to collect a quick check."

My favorite bit is the plaintiffs' lawyer keeping the fingertip in the freezer. It's a pity that he didn't whip  the dessicated digit out in open court. But it was probably an unimpressive sight since it was 7 years old.

 

 

NOLA Trashola

There have been many trash/garbage controversies in post-K NOLA. It's obvious why: we had a whole lotta extra shit to haul away including a flotilla of stinky refrigerators. The stench of the latter remains one of my most vivid recollections of coming home, as you can see from the picture above, which was taken by Dr. A.  Duct tape sure came in handy, y'all.

I assume you've heard of payola whereby the record companies paid dee jays to play their records. There's a brand new-n-red hot controversy involving trashola: local talk radio super mouth, Garland Robinette is listed as a "lobbyist" for well known shitbag Fred Heebe's River Birch landfill. Garland who is best known as a stern moralist who excoriates graft and corruption was paid a cool $250K in trashola:

WWL talk radio host Garland Robinette received $250,000 from the owner of the River Birch Landfill in October 2007, after Robinette routinely used his show to criticize the reopening of the rival Old Gentilly Landfill to dispose of Hurricane Katrina debris, his attorney confirmed. Federal authorities investigating River Birch flagged the monetary transfer and interviewed Robinette several times late last year, said Robinette's attorney Dane Ciolino, who said the money was a loan.

"They asked him a lot of questions, and he has cooperated fully," Ciolino said Friday. "He has been told that he is not a subject or target of the investigation."

Embattled River Birch owner Fred Heebe loaned Robinette the money through a company Heebe owns, Ciolino said. "Fred Heebe is a personal friend of Garland's" he said, "and it was a personal loan."

Nice friend. Anyone out there wanna loan me $250K? I'm not good for it and I may skip town but what's a disappearing act between friends? 

Talk about not passing the smell test: Heebe is a well known GOP crony capitalist creep. He was appointed US Attorney in 2001 by President Beavis but had to withdraw because of allegations of wife beating. Heebe had two qualifications for that post: a law degree and bigass donations to the Bush campaign and the Gret Stet goopers. There's a lovely irony that this stinky businessman is being investigated by the agency he aspired to head.

Back to Garland Robinette. I'm not sure what WWL radio's reaction to this will be: his show the Think Tank is a ratings winner. Additionally, I'm not sure as to whether or not this loan/bribe/gift or whatever is illegal. If nothing else Robinette will be hearing from the IRS sooner rather than later.

There's nothing like the smell of a trash scandal to get my juices flowing on a blustery morning, My friend Liprap is having fun with this on the tweeter tube by deploying the hastag: #stinktank.

That's right, ladies and germs, trashola has converted the Think Tank into the Stink Tank. I'll update this rubbish as the story progresses.

Malaka Of The Week: David Cameron

There are many reasons why British Prime Minister David Cameron (aka the Posh Boy) should be malaka of the week but I'll focus on his weirdest statement of this turbulent week in the UK:

David Cameron has told parliament that in the wake of this week's riots the government is looking at banning people from using social networking sites such as Twitter and Facebook if they are thought to be plotting criminal activity.

The prime minister said the government will review whether it is possible to stop suspected rioters spreading online messages, in his opening statement during a Commons debate on Thursday on the widespread civil disorder for which MPs were recalled from their summer recess.

Answering questions after his statement, Cameron said the home secretary, Theresa May, will hold meetings with Facebook, Twitter and Research In Motion within weeks to discuss their responsibilities in this area.

The prime minister also said that broadcasters – including the BBC and Sky News – have a responsibility to hand unused footage of the riots to police.

Past attempts to force broadcasters to hand over their footage have been met with fierce resistance. On Wednesday, the BBC's head of newsgathering, Fran Unsworth, said voluntarily giving unused footage to the police would damage broadcasters' editorial independence.

"Everyone watching these horrific actions will be struck by how they were organised via social media. Free flow of information can be used for good. But it can also be used for ill," said Cameron.

"And when people are using social media for violence we need to stop them. So we are working with the police, the intelligence services and industry to look at whether it would be right to stop people communicating via these websites and sevices when we know they are plotting violence, disorder and criminality.

How does Cameron propose to do this? By jawboning, which will, of course, not work. I assume that the Posh Boy is far too grand to actually use social networks himself so perhaps he can have his valet check into it on his behalf. It's what Bertie Wooster would do...

The initial spark for the rioting were savage public sector budget cuts, which threw thousands out of work and on to the dole. Among the agencies cut were-you guessed it-the police. Cameron's war of words with the cops continues as he refuses to relent on po po funding cuts. Cameron would  be well advised to patch up his differences with the constabulary and pronto. It's what his *real* political role model, Tony Blair, would do. Blair would look resolute, hector the rioters and back the police while his Home Secretary would be in charge of rescinding the police spending cuts. The Brits call this a U-turn and it's nothing compared to the gymnastic flip flops of Mitt Haircut.

The core malakatude of this situation is that the Conservative party is at war with the bobbies, which cannot end well for them. It's another test for Labour Party leader Ed Miliband who has to walk a delicate balance between condemnation of the looters and attacking the coaltion. The Tories are making it easier for him by blasting the coppers and refusing to take any responsibilty. Maybe they can blame the perennially po faced Deputy PM Nick Clegg. It's what junior coalition partners are for, after all...

I'll let Frank Zappa have the last word with this Watts riots inspired classic:

 

Yeah, I know the clip is blurry but it features the antics of Napoleon Murphy Brock who has one of the best names in rock and roll history.

London Calling

It's a long hot summer everywhere but particularly in the UK. The rioting in London and elsewhere is conjuring up memories of the late 1970's and early 1980's. There were riots in Brixton in 1981 caused by Tory budget cuts and heavy handed policing. Sound familiar?

One thing that *has* changed, however, is the relationship between the government and the police. David Cameron is suffering some fallout from the phone hacking scandal, which caused several senior coppers to resign and blast the Posh Boy on their way out. Also, Mrs.Thatcher had the good sense *not* to cut spending on police. Nobody has ever accused Cameron of having common sense; nothing common about the Posh Boy or sensible either:

The parallels with the 1980s are everywhere; in the burnt-out buildings, the looting, the anger of an apparently disenfranchised youth and the agonising over what caused an urban uprising which police have labelled the worst disorder in living memory.

There is one significant difference, however. During the riots of the 1980s, when Brixton and Toxteth burned and PC Keith Blakelock was hacked down with a machete as he fled for his life in Broadwater Farm, the police could count on the full support of the government. Margaret Thatcher was in power and the police were seen as an unquestioning arm of the state.

On Tuesday as David Cameron sits around the table with the home secretary, Theresa May, and senior police officers the ambience will not be a warm one. Relations between the country's top police officers and the Conservative leadership are at an all-time low, with senior Tory sources briefing against the country's top officers and they in turn speaking openly of the "stupidity" of government policy.

Cuts to frontline policing – an estimated 12,000 officers are to go as a result of budget reductions – the determination of the coalition to impose elected commissioners, the attacks on the public service pensions of both rank-and-file and senior officers and the Winsor review into pay and conditions have all served to increase tensions.

<snip>

A senior police source has said privately that the government holds the police in utter contempt and, while the service is resilient, the government is starting to lose goodwill from both rank-and-file and senior ranks.

Asked to put their lives on the line night after night, sources say the rank and file feel unsupported and vilified by the government.

It's quite unusual for a right of center government to have such a terrible relationship with the po po BUT this is class based mutual loathing. I keep waiting for the Tories to blame Brown and Blair for the chaos but they haven't quite gone there yet. But they will, they're already making shit up about Labour Shadow Cabinet member Diane Abbott who happens to be-you guessed it-black. It's time for the nasty party to come out of the sewer and start throwing shit around. It will be interesting to see how Deputy PM Nick Clegg and the Lib Dems respond to this: they'll probably stick to the old stiff upper lip and say nothing.

Since everyone is talking about the dark days of 1979 and 1981, here's one of the quintessential British bands of that era:

 

Humphrey Weeps

Hubert Humphrey was one of the unsung heroes of the Civil Rights Movement because he worked within the system instead of manning the barricades. But he was the main Senate sponsor of the 1964 Civil Rights Act and the man who gave an awesome speech at the 1948 Democratic convention that led to the Dixiecrats bolting and eventually to Truman's victory:

To those who say that this civil-rights program is an infringement on states’ rights, I say this: The time has arrived in America for the Democratic Party to get out of the shadow of states' rights and to walk forthrightly into the bright sunshine of human rights.

Here's an audio clip of the speech:

 

 Now that I've given you some much needed uplift, here's the story that would have made Hubert weep:

 Students at a high school in Red Wing, Minnesota brought school spirit to new lows with a "Wigger Wednesday" dress-up day tradition, according to a lawsuit filed against the school district.

Quera Pruitt, a Red Wing high school alumna, is suing the school district and administrators over creating a hostile and racist educational environment.

Here's what happened: Students during the 2008 and 2009 homecoming celebrations wore "oversized sports jerseys, low-slung pants, baseball bats cocked to the side and 'doo rags' on their heads," according to the suit. About 60 or 70 students took what was supposed to be "tropical day" and turned it into "wigger day," the suit claims. To the unfamiliar, and as the case points out, the term "wigger" is a derogatory term for a white person who emulates African-American culture.

"'Wigger Day' is the same thing as 'nigger day,' " Pruitt's lawyer, Joshua Williams, told TPM. "That's what my client feels, and that's what I feel."

At least they could have called it "wigra day." For the young'uns out there: nigra was the word that segregationists such as Mississippi Senator James Eastland used when they were trying to be polite.

This story provides an answer to a question Dr. A has asked me more than once: "How can the state of Humphrey, Mondale and Wellstone have produced Michelle Bachmann?"

Bigots don't respect Minnesota nice.

The Norwegian Way

Prime Minister Stoltenberg on the Breivik attack:

The Norwegian prime minister, Jens Stoltenberg, says his country will "not be intimidated or threatened" by Friday's terror attacks, which left 76 people dead.

The country would "stand firm in defending our values" and the "open, tolerant and inclusive society", he said. "The Norwegian response to violence is more democracy, more openness and greater political participation."

The "horrific and brutal" attacks were an assault on Norway's "fundamental values", added Stoltenberg. "We have to be very clear to distinguish between extreme views, opinions that it's completely legal, legitimate to have. What is not legitimate is to try to implement those extreme views by using violence," he said.

How refreshing is that? We're used to national leaders stressing the 3 Rs after such an attack: revenge, retribution and repression. It makes me proud to be half-Norwegian.

Rupert Murdoch: Backdoor Man

I haven't had so much fun following a political scandal since Watergate. Holy crap, I just dated myself. The thing I *love* about the phone hacking scandal is that a major asshole is getting at least a partial comeuppance. Rupe won't be going on the dole any time soon but his hold over British politicians has been smashed to smithereens. What follows is my semi-informed analysis on this very entertaining scandal. I'm feeling summer ennui so I've dispensed with extensive hyperlinking but the best coverage can be found (where else?) at the Guardian's web site.

Rupe has been apologizing a lot this week but his"humble" act has been a crock of crocodile tears. It was made clear when he declined to take responsibility for anything done by the oily hacks at NOTW. Yeah, it's a big fucking company but it would make his apologies sound more sincere if he'd say "the buck stops here." Yo, Rupe it's the self made man thing to do: suck it up and move on, mate.

Murdoch the elder's synthetic humility is reminiscent of Uriah Heep: the Dickens character, not the band named for him. He's all unctuous right now but when the time comes to stick the shiv in, the old pirate will be back in character: he's Bill Sikes with big bucks. But as bad as Rupe is, he's at least an interesting character: James Murdoch comes off as an android with an MBA.

The action shifted on Tuesday to the House of Commons with a statement from the Posh Boy followed by 136, count 'em 136, questions from MPs. I watched it on live stream and he did reasonably well but his skin lacked its usual pink-ish color: it was gray and parchment like. His answers were smooth but evasive. He kinda, sorta admitted that hiring Murdoch henchman Andy Coulson was a bad idea but it was what Watergate creep, John Ehrlichmann, once described as a "modified limited hangout."

The story that's emerging is that in order to suck up adequately to Rupe, Cameron was advised to hire Andy Coulson as his communications director by Rebekah Brooks. It seems that tough old Ozzie Rupert disliked David Cameron and his Etonian school tie. On a personal level, Rupe preferred gruff and cantakerous Gordon Brown so the Posh Boy let Rupe have his way with him. I doubt that it was necessary: the UK Murdoch press' politics have been characterized by opportunism, they were likely to switch to the Tories in any event. Cameron's arse kissing has him eating shit right now. Couldn't happen to a nicer guy.

Labour party leader Ed Miliband has had the best two weeks of his tenure. There's was a lot of criticism of young Miliband's early days as leader but he appears to have hit his stride. If nothing else, Labour was wise to skip a generation and go with a leader who has had minimal dealings with the Murdoch press. Like the GOP during Watergate, the Tories have been working the "everybody does it" angle but it's not working as well as expected.

The other leader who appears a bit unsteady at this point is Cameron's Deputy PM, the Liberal Democrats' leader Nick Clegg. The Tories' junior partners have taken a hammering from their own supporters over severe government spending cuts that the Lib Dems pledged to mitigate but largely have not. This would be an opportune moment for Clegg to pull the plug on the coalition and force Cameron to govern with a parliamentary minority. It would be the politically wise thing for the Lib Dems to quit the govenment BUT it looks unlikely unless much more shit hits the fan. Why? Clegg is a classic goo goo who puts process above politics and even policy. I expect him to eventually say: "We promised to stay the course for 5 years and we will honor our word." The coalition is looking more and more like a suicide pact for the Lib Dems but Clegg is unlikely to seize this chance to remove the straight razor from his party's throat. Stiff upper lip and all that shit...

Time to circle round to the post title: Murdoch's revelation that not only has he been a frequent vistor to 10 Downing Street but that he always enters via the back door. It seems to be an apt metaphor: Rupe and his minions have been administering a right buggering to Britain's political class, which of course rhymes with you know what...

I'm sure other shoes will drop in this scandal including here in the US & A. I'll, however, leave that for another day and let Willie Dixon via Jim Morrison have the last word:

 

NOLA Monkey Business

New Orleans is a great news town and an even better news of the weird town. I give you the touching case of a touching monkey:

A Texas woman and a Florida man have been convicted of cruelty to monkeys they dressed as pirates and brought onto Bourbon Street in New Orleans nine days before Mardi Gras, the state Department of Wildlife and Fisheries said Friday.

A jury also convicted James Wells Poole, 62, of St. Augustine, Fla., and 64-year-old Joan Susanne Newberger of Rio Hondo, Texas, on Thursday of lacking permits for the monkeys.

"The monkeys were ... in poor overall health with a diaper rash, dehydration and piercings," department spokesman Adam Einck said in an email Friday.

Einck said state wildlife agents confiscated the monkeys Feb. 26 after watching them touch people as part of a street act.

Newberger, who the department said also is known as Joan Poole, told New Orleans television stations at the time that she is autistic and the patas monkey and three marmosets are service animals that help her bathe and do other daily tasks.

They also said they were just masking for Mardi Gras, and dressed the monkeys to match.

Wildlife agents said in February that they were charging $2 for people who wanted their pictures taken with the monkeys. Newberger told WWL-TV that people were pestering her for pictures, and she started charging to discourage them.

Civil District Judge Sean Early ordered Poole and Newberger to forfeit the monkeys to the state. The state will give them to the Louisiana Purchase Gardens and Zoo in Monroe, where they have been living.

I wonder if Dieter has heard about this?

 

 

Scalia to Wal-Mart Women: Drop Dead

The Supremes continue their inexorable rush to the Right. They're starting to look like the pre-New Deal Court that thought any guvmint regulation was evil and that the invisible hand of the marketplace belonged to God Almighty.

They're even siding with big business when considerations of judicial efficiency should be considered let alone truth, justice and the American way. Dahlia Litiwck knows a lot more about this than I do:

... the Supreme Court decided what may well be the most consequential case of the current term, Wal-Mart v. Dukes, a sweeping class action suit filed almost 10 years ago that has yet to be litigated on its merits. Filed on behalf of the more than 1.5 million women who have worked at Wal-Mart since 1998, the suit alleges that the company favored men over women in decisions about pay and promotion in violation of Title VII of the Civil Rights Act. Today, the Supreme Court told them all to go home.

Writing for the court's five conservatives—and all but one of its men—Justice Antonin Scalia found that the women seeking to be certified as a single class did not have enough in common to go forward with the lawsuit en masse. Wal-Mart, the nation's largest private employer, seems to have figured out that the key to low-cost discrimination lies in discriminating on a massive scale. In Scalia's words, all these disparate women with their multiple claims about "millions of employment decisions" lacked sufficient "glue" to be permitted to move forward together.

A lot of critics are saying that this decision has created a new rule: Some companies are simply too big to sue. But that's only half the story. The other half is that in the court's eyes, sex discrimination is simply too pervasive to be a problem.

The conservative judicial counterrevolution is in full frenzy right now. Don't let their robes and stoic demeanor fool you: Alito, Thomas and Scalia are fanatics. And underneath Chief Justice Roberts' jovial facade beats the heart of a guy who cooked up some of the most retrograde legal policies of the Reagan Justice Department. John Roberts is Ed Meese with a handsome face.

The rightward momentum of the Court since Sandra Day O'Connor's retirement is why some of the horrible anti-choice being passed by state legislatures aren't being challenged in Federal Court. Absent some major personnel changes, this court is quite capable of overruling Roe v. Wade.

Batten down the hatches, y'all, we're in for a bumpy ride unless one of hardcore wingnut Justices retires or croaks. 

Is it Tricky Dick's fault?

Richard Nixon gave tape recording a bad name in the nation's capitol. It's one possible explanation for the FBI's continuing refusal to record interview sessions. It's certainly more plausible than the Feebs feeble explanation of "storage problems" among other excuses given in an article by Brenda McCarthy of the New Orleans Times-Picayune.  Guess the allegedly high tech bureau has never heard of digital recording.

The first paragraph was a gynormous excuse to post Picayune columnist James Gill's typically witty take on this bureaucratic silliness:

Unless you just robbed a bank, or drove across the state line with a trunkful of smack, you might think there is nothing to fear if the FBI requests an interview.

Do not be a sucker. It is not just a sin to tell a lie, but a crime, if your interlocutor is a federal agent. Although the feds may have nothing else on you, recollections of what you said will always differ to some extent, and you may still wind up charged with lying.

If that happens, the jury will have to rely on intuition, because it is impossible to prove who is right. The FBI disdains such new-fangled devices as tape recorders.

And the smart money is generally on the government, because jurors tend to assume that FBI agents are straight-talking and untouchable. This is only to be expected; most jurors have led sheltered lives.

The vast array of technological wizardry at the FBI's disposal has not affected its interviewing methods, which are strongly reminiscent of Allan Pinkerton when he was pursuing train robbers before the Civil War. A notebook and pen are all that is required.

The attorney general has now rounded up a gang of U.S. attorneys to consider whether a little modernization is in order. If it is justice we want, the answer is obviously yes. Recording interviews would make it harder for the government to railroad suspects and harder for desperadoes to wriggle out of incriminating statements.

It's good enough for Scotland Yard but the FBI seems stuck in the days of J Edgar Hee Haw and Clyde Tolson on this issue.

Or do the ghosts of Rose Mary Woods and Mark Felt haunt FBI HQ? I can't help imagining Nixon's loyal secretary forever rolling down the corridors in a swivel chair  erasing 18 1/2 minute gaps or lying about it to protect Nixon's worthless ass. As for Deep Throat, he's trudging about looking for parking garages to meet with Woodward. Or maybe not.

 

 

The Case Of The Foiled Moil

Dicks are still in the news. There's an effort in San Francisco and Santa Monica to ban via the ballot box male circumcision as a form of mutilation. I'm not sure what I think of this but there are some Rabbis who are rabid about the issue. Many moils are in turmoil as well...

Well, they vote on everything in my home state so why not this?  California may be low on money right now but there may be an excess of foreskins very soon...

And I haven't even started on the briss jokes...

Plastic Man

I never cared for John Edwards. He always struck me as synthetic and inauthentic even for a politician. He was a conserva-Dem in North Caroline then became a populist who claimed to be post-K New Orleans' best friend. He was not but I didn't believe him anyway.

Now he's under indictment for paying hush money from campaign funds to his annoying mistress. I can't say that I care much what happens to him. All I can say is, thank God he wasn't the 2008 Democratic nominee since his love child scandal broke during the convention.

 

Malakas Of The Week: The U.S. Conference Of Catholic Bishops

It's institutional malakatude time again here at First Draft. The Catholic Bishops have issued their long awaited report on pervy pedophile priests. Do they blame celibacy? Hell, no. They blame hippies like Wavy Gravy and Woodstock, man.

The report says, the abuse occurred because priests who were poorly prepared and monitored, and were under stress, landed amid the social and sexual turmoil of the 1960s and ’70s.

Known occurrences of sexual abuse of minors by priests rose sharply during those decades, the report found, and the problem grew worse when the church’s hierarchy responded by showing more care for the perpetrators than the victims.

The “blame Woodstock” explanation has been floated by bishops since the church was engulfed by scandal in the United States in 2002 and by Pope Benedict XVI after it erupted in Europe in 2010.

Hmm, I wonder what kind of weed the authors of the report were smoking: I want some, man.

This is a ridiculous conclusion that lets the Bishopric (apt image, no?) off the hook. My theory is that celibacy and sexual repression were the primary causes. Imagine a very religious young man who finds himself turned on by other men; something that is verboten under Catholic doctrine. He struggles against his desires and realizes that there's no better place to repress sexual longings than the priesthood. Some of those young men had genuinely perverse desires to repress but not according to the lawyers who wrote the report:

In one of the most counterintuitive findings, the report says that fewer than 5 percent of the abusive priests exhibited behavior consistent with pedophilia, which it defines as a “psychiatric disorder that is characterized by recurrent fantasies, urges and behaviors about prepubescent children.

“Thus, it is inaccurate to refer to abusers as ‘pedophile priests,’ ” the report says.

That finding is likely to prove controversial, in part because the report employs a definition of “prepubescent” children as those age 10 and under. Using this cutoff, the report found that only 22 percent of the priests’ victims were prepubescent.

The American Psychiatric Association’s Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders classifies a prepubescent child as generally age 13 or younger. If the John Jay researchers had used that cutoff, a vast majority of the abusers’ victims would have been considered prepubescent.

This is not a "report" it is an argument on behalf of the Bishops. That's right, the same men who either stuck their heads in the sand, looked the other way or actively covered up for pervy padres. The Bishops continue to allow their need to defend themselves from litigation to overwhelm their pastoral duties to their parishioners.

The only positive thing I can say about the "report" is that at least it doesn't blame same-sexuality, which some members of the Catholic clergy and laity are prone to do. The whole thing reeks of malakatude of the most odious kind.

I'm not Catholic but my wife is and we live in a very Catholic city. Dr. A stopped going to mass because she got tired of being hectored by Opus Dei-style right wing priests on hot button social issues like abortion instead of hearing about social justice and protecting the weakest members of society such as children. Of course, our former Archbishop Alfred Hughes helped run the pervy priests cover-up for Cardinal Law in Boston so what else could we expect?

Finally, back to the preposterous imagery that this report planted in my brain: blame it on Woodstock. If that's the case perhaps the Bishops need a new logo: something along the lines of the keep on truckin' guy in a cassock holding a lighter whose flame forms a cross with the Woodstock logo in the background. That would be silly but no sillier than this report's passing the buck from the Church to hippies and free love. Bollocks.

It's time for the Bishops to face the music instead dancing around the truth:

 

 

 

Safer than the freezer?

As you surely recall, my former Congress critter Dollar Bill Jefferson stashed some of his ill gotten booty in his freezer. A former Maryland pol who just copped a plea may have topped him:

Former Prince George's County (Md.) Executive Jack Johnson had to sign court documents admitting he told his wife to take cash and "stuff it down your panties" as FBI agents knocked on the door prepared to search their home.

The underwear dodge obviously did not work...

Muppet Lust

      

First there was Opus' penguin lust and now appearing at the federal courthouse in New Orleans, we have an epic production that could be called, Muppet lust. Muppet is a nickname given by my NOLA blogger colleague Dambala to former Nagin technology honcho, Greg Meffert who is pictured above. That's a deceptive picture: Muppet is *much* uglier than that: he has bug eyes, pasty skin and an Alfalfa-like cowlick. He makes Gonzo or Fozzie look like hotties and unlike Kermit, he's a toad, not a frog.

The trial in question involves contractual shenanigans when Muppet was C Ray's right hand man. Right after Katrina, Muppet claimed to be Deputy Mayor, which was a post that did not exist. Meffert is not in the dock, he rolled over on the man who bribed him, Mark St. Pierre. The latter was Muppet's business partner before he entered guvmint and, in a classic case of crony capitalism, received big-ass city contracts for items such as "crime" cameras that were horrendously expensive and rarely worked.

Since Muppet was not an elected official, the bribes in question involved credit card use, trips and, most memorably off all, a yacht, the Silicon Bayou that was rented for Meffert's use and led to the Muppet Lust and sleazy sexy times mentioned in the post title. Dambala, the world's only known investigative zombie blogger was there to see Meffert testify and here's his account:

Moving on to the juicy shit, the questioning started leaning toward Jimmy "Renaissance Man" Goodson and that's when the dirty did arise.

By now you all know Meff confessed to buying the Silicon Bayou..the boat, the muthafuckin' boat... to provide more privacy for the stripper/poker parties they were having on Tuesday and Thursday nights.  As I was sitting there listening to the line of questioning, I started to sense this was about to take an ugly turn...so did the jury as they were visibly squirming in their seats.

Meff confessed that Jimmy Goodson, a childhood friend of St. Pierre, would procure "strippers" for the party nights on the boat and that St. Pierre would pay for it all.  As this was going on, I thought "Well, I guess they had to bring that up to the jury but it'll end there."

It didn't.

The prosecution then asked what these "strippers" did at the parties.  Meff retorted, "They performed sexual acts."

Oh shit, methought.  Surely they aren't gonna....

Prosecutor:  "Who did they perform these sexual acts on? On you?"

Meff:  "On me and everybody...."

He was mumbling like a 3 year old who just pissed his pants.  Meanwhile, not only the jury, but everyone in the room was shifting in their seats like they had stomach problems.

That's right folks, they went from silicon chips to chippies with silcone <rim shot>

There's, of course, some schadenfreude involved in this account: Dambala aka Jason Berry was one of the people who unearthed the yuppie, gentrified corruption that characterized the Nagin administration. Greg Meffert was at the center of everything: an entitled smug little worm of a man. In essence, Meffert is a nerd/dork/geek whatever you want to call it. He's one of those guys who *always* wanted to hang out with the cool kids and finally got his chance as an adult: Mayor Nagin and defendant St. Pierre are the cool kids in question. I suspect Muppet wishes he'd remained a dorky outsider instead of chilling with the cool kids; it's gotten him into hot, hot water.

The larger question surrounding the trial is whether or not former Mayor Nagin will be the next domino to fall. He did reap some benefits from the credit card given to Meffert by St. Pierre: meals, vacations and even free yard work. BUT in typical dork trying to impress the cool kid fashion, Muppet told C Ray that it was *his* treat and not on the city's dime. We know that Ray Ray was present for some of the sexy times parties on the yacht but I'll leave that prurient detail alone.

Since this is local story, here's a link to a piece at TPM, which serves as a NOLA sleaze primer of sorts.

We do *everything* big here in the Big Easy so when we have a corruption scandal, it's usually entertaining as hell.

Heckuva job, Muppet.

UPDATE: More fun today at the St Pierre trial featuring the defendant's lackey and procurer of women for Muppet, Big Jim Goodson.

Malaka Of The Week: Nicolas Cage

Yeah, I know: this is low hanging fruit BUT it's irresistible since the latest Cage meltdown occurred in my city. Now that I think of it, Nicolas Cage comes to NOLA to get drunk and arrested. Guess he buys into the lowest common denominator visitor thing. Actually, he's what I call a parachutist (very part time New Orleanian) but today I call him malaka of the week.

Cage's latest bout of drunken NOLA malakatude occurred last week:

Sources familiar with the situation tell TMZ ... Nic was "very drunk" on the streets of N.O. when a cab driver saw him loudly arguing with his wife Alice.

We're told the cabbie called the police and said in addition to the screaming and yelling ... he saw Nic grab her.

We're told the police came and told Nic and his wife to just go home. That's when Nic allegedly told cops, "Why don't you just arrest me?" The cops then reiterated that he and his wife should just go home. Cage then repeated his dare to cops.

At that point, police took Nic into custody and charged him with ...domestic abuse and disturbing the peace.

As we all know, malakatude and dumbassery are kissing cousins and insisting that the cops bust you is a one way ticket to the slammer.

As a New Orleanian, I have no problem with people getting drunk but I have a problem with people who cannot hold their liquor. Another of Nic Cage's problems is misogyny. When he was Bacchus in 2002, rumors swirled about town that he made a pass at a krewe member's wife and was outraged when there were objections. Apparently, Cage told the Bacchus spouse that she should be flattered that a movie star hit on her. Whatever, dude. This OTT hammy actor thinks that he's God's gift to women.

During Carnival, Cage was nearly caged for being drunk and disorderly at Stella, which is an upscale eatery on Chartres Street owned by celebrity chef, Scott Boswell. Here's an extended excerpt from an hilarious piece by Jim Nelson of GQ who just happened to be there when Nic Cage did that malakatude that he dude so well:

He stood at the entrance of the room, clutching the hostess stand for balance, and glared out at the diners. The entire place went stone silent. He moved, stumbled, came closer to our tables.

"Where's the REAL girls?" he moaned.

Huh? A few more paces. He's a foot away from my andouille sausage. Quick. Someone feed him.

"WHERE'S THE REAL GIRLS?"

He spotted them in the corner, and moved toward them like a drugged Sasquatch. The room seemed to sway like an uncertain boat. The two ladies, alas, had manly company at the table. This did not dissuade Cage.

"You." He pointed at the brunette. "You're a contender." He turned to the blonde. "You're not."

He was soon escorted out of the restaurant by a couple armfuls of hospitality. A manager type stood in the driveway outside and tried to gently scoot him off, the way you might shoo a raccoon you're not sure is feral. Nearby you could hear the carnival howls of Mardi Gras. The room sighed, slowly went back to digesting.

Then we heard another tussle. Cage was at the doorway, trying to get past the manager dude, grabbing onto the walls, his arms extended out as if he were desperate to catch an existential football. His hand went through a panel in the door, shattering the glass. "You LOVE ME!" he shouted to the restaurant staff, who surely at one point did.

Cops were called. In New Orleans that usually means nothing happens. But they turned up—for a drunk-and-disorderly at Mardi Gras, no less. He was taken home, not arrested. But he suffered, I imagine, a head-cracking case of morning shame.

Well, at least he didn't demand that the po po take him away that time. Of course, he should have learned a lesson from this earlier altercation and not demanded to check in to the Parish Prison last week. Part of me thinks I shouldn't kick someone when they're down and I wouldn't do so if Cage weren't such an insufferably arrogant and entitled douchebag. And douchebaggery is synonymous with malakatude.

Show Me

Missouri House passes a law banning sharia law.

Good to know that if one steals something in the Show Me state that one won't lose one's hands. One is no longer the loneliest number...

I would, however, get a kick out of seeing Jude in a veil. Holy Salome, Batman. Oops, wrong religious analogy but it would be funny anyhoo.

The Case Of The Tranny Hooker Burglary Ring

The New Orleans area is full of eccentric and downright nutty folks. That goes for our criminals as well. Every few years there seems to be a crime wave perpetrated by drag queens and/or cross dressers. There was such an outbreak Uptown a few years back and now it's happening on "glorious" Airline Highway.

Airline Highway was built by Huey P Long so he could vamoose out of Red Stick to the Roosevelt Hotel in downtown NOLA on a modern highway. Parts of Airline are memorably seedy. In fact, it's where Jimmy Swaggart "sinned" with one of the skankiest hookers in the annals of scandaldom.

Here's a story from WWL-TV's Scott Satchfield about the latest crime wave featuring men in hose; or is that hos in hose?

 

Going Dickensian on the fake empire

"The Straight Dope." Bill Moyers talks to David Simon Go read it.

Bill Moyers: Do you really believe, as you said to those students at Loyola, that we’re not going to make it?

David Simon: We’re not going to make it as a first-rate empire. And I’m not sure that that’s a bad thing in the end. Empires end, and that doesn’t mean cultures end completely, and it doesn’t even mean that for nation-states. If you looked at Britain in 1952 and what was being presided over by Anthony Eden and those guys, you’d have said, “Man, what’s going to be left?” But Britain’s still there, and they’ve come to terms with what they can and can’t do. Americans are still sort of in an age of delusion, I think. A lot of our foreign policy represents that. And this notion that the markets were always going to go up, and that once we had invested stocks to death, we could create some new equity out of nothing.

 

via Guernica.

 

Crossposted at Back of Town

Satan's Botoxed Handmaiden Sued

My friend, Gambit Tabloid editor, playwright, blogger and all around bon vivant Kevin Allman dubbed the dread Ariana Huffington, Satan's Botoxed Handmaiden many moons ago. Why? Partially because the HuffPo fed off the work of unpaid bloggers like a tape worm on meth.

Now that Satan's Botoxed Handmaiden's site has been sold to AOL, HuffPo and its new masters are being sued by the aformentioned unpaid bloggers. Call it revenge of the nerds or geeks or whatever:

Ariana Huffington her website and AOL were on the receiving end of a $105m (£64.5m) lawsuit by a group of angry bloggers unhappy that she sold the Huffington Post for $315m without them being paid a penny.

The class action is led by Jonathan Tasini, a writer and trade unionist, who wrote more than 250 posts for Huffington Post on an unpaid basis until he dropped out shortly after the news and comment site was sold to AOL earlier this year.

Tasini complained that "Huffington bloggers have essentially been turned into modern day slaves on Arianna Huffington's plantation" and said he was bringing the action because "people who create content ... have to be compensated" for their efforts.

The complainant and his lawyers estimate about 9,000 people wrote for the Huffington Post on an unpaid basis – and argue that their writings helped contribute about a third of the sale value of the site, the basis of their $105m claim for compensation.

Tasini was behind a successful lawsuit on behalf of freelance journalists against the New York Times a decade ago. He won a 2001 supreme court judgment that concluded copyright for print and online versions of an article were separate – meaning writers have to assign permission for a publisher to use both.

Still On The Road To Nowhere

It's been a tough few years for former Florida Governor Charlie Crist. He's gone from a GOP golden boy to a candidate drowned by the teabagger wave in 2010. He was also sued by the notoriously tetchy David Byrne for using Road To Nowhere in a campaign ad without Bryne's permission. Byrne sued and the ex-Governor has settled with the ex-Talking Heads front man. Here's Charlie looking a bit less tanned than usual:

 

Sorry, Charlie, you used the wrong tune-a.

Now that I've posted that groaner, here's the original video for the song that was at the heart of the controversy. Talking Heads are perhaps the least likely super-band to ever regroup. Why? Everyone else in the band loathes David Bryne and would surely nominate him for the malakatude hall of fame. They made some pretty darn great music though:

 

Guns Stopping Rape

I feel terrible for this woman because she thinks she could have stopped what happened to her:

Amanda Collins, 25, is a wife and new mom, and a concealed weapon permit holder for years. At her father's law office in Reno, she showed us the 9-mm Glock she carries for her safety.

"It's got a pretty standard magazine," she said, "and night sights so you can see in the dark when you're aiming."

However, Collins couldn't aim her gun at the serial rapist who attacked her at the University of Nevada at Reno, where she was a student. That's because, like most public colleges outside of Utah and Colorado, UNR is a "gun free" zone. The rule required her to leave her gun at home, leaving her defenseless the one time she needed its protection most.

In October of 2007, while walking to her car after a night class, Collins was grabbed from behind in a university parking garage less than 300 yards from a campus police office. The school's "gun-free" designation meant nothing to James Biela, a serial rapist with a gun of his own, who saw Collins as an easy target. "He put a firearm to my temple," she recounted, "clocked off the safety, and told me not to say anything, before he raped me."

The university has since installed more emergency call boxes and lights in the parking structure, but Collins says that won't stop an attacker who knows the campus is a gun-free zone, a policy she believes invites crime, and may have even emboldened the man who raped her.

With all due respect to her experience and point of view, what might have stopped her particular rape would not stop all rapes, and the only thing for sure that will stop all rapes is RAPISTS ALWAYS GOING TO JAIL AND NOT RAPING PEOPLE ANYMORE. That's pretty much the only sure thing, and it's also the thing that gets talked about the least, because it's easier to tell victims, over and over, how to defend themselves so that if they can't or don't, it's in some fashion their fault.

A.

Tales of the "Lost Cause"

46% of Mississippi Goopers think interracial marriage should be illegal. Guess they've never heard of one of my all-time favorite Supreme Court cases: Loving v. Virginia. I love it for both the holding and the case name itself. Who doesn't love loving, after all?

I'm not, however, loving the Mississippi GOP. Hmm, I wonder if they polled them about bringing the confederate mascot back to Ole Miss. Bet they favor that as well.

Prosser Prosser Prosser, OUT OUT OUT!

With the little town of Lake Mills finally reporting in, it's Kloppenburg by 222 votes!

There will be a recount, and I don't know the chances of the lead actually changing hands, but for now, it's good!

A.

Don't Ever Let Anyone Tell You to Sit Down Again

Not ever, you guys. Not ever even once.

Journal Sentinel: Credit: Joe Koshollek

A few weeks ago Prosser was gonna cruise to victory. A few weeks ago people who lived next door to Joanne Kloppenburg probably would have had trouble picking her out of a lineup, and now? Now? The whole country knows her name, because in the midst of a revolution electing her became something people could do so they did it. They knocked on doors and drove people to the polls and phonebanked and worked their asses off, and look at that.

These people were alone with their clipboards facing the entire Koch brothers army and they drove them back to the edge of the goddamn cliff. This thing might not be over for days, weeks even, or it might be over by the time I wake up later today, but whatever happens, that isn't nothing. Making something a fight that shouldn't have even been a fight, isn't nothing.

What I would like, what I would really really like here, is for anybody who ever said that protesting was stupid, that it didn't mean anything, that it wouldn't change anything, that it was silly and childish and turned people off and was counterproductive and OMG HIPPIES ETC, to take a look at what happened yesterday and take a lesson, the kind of lesson that sticks. 

Standing up for yourself, for your rights, for what you believe, is never silly and it's never childish and you never know what it's going to change, so don't hamstring yourself, for Christ's sakes, don't stop yourself before you start. Fling yourself out into the world and say what is important to you. What else are you here for? You never know how many people will show up to stand beside you. It might be nobody.

And it might be tens of thousands, and they might stay beside you for days, and your voice might be joined by thousands, and all your voices might rise up and you might put somebody on the high court, and you might change the world. Don't tune it out. Don't assume it's a T-shirt slogan. Watch it when happens around you, and remember, and tell everyone you know everything you can tell them about everything you see. This doesn't come along very often. That's why you have to give it lots of chances to happen. Look. 

A.

It Is Breaking News That Republicans are Obeying the Law

People. I have not had enough banana bread and/or cobra venom to deal with this level of stupidity today:

The state's new law to dramatically limit collective bargaining for public workers has not been published and is not in effect, a judge said Thursday.

An official in Republican Gov. Scott Walker's administration said he plans to comply with that order and to suspend preparations for deducting money from workers' paychecks.

It's so very very generous, to agree to sit down after somebody smacks you in the face with a bag of nickels and yells SIT DOWN MOTHERFRAKKER two dozen times. It's such a kind concession to say yes, the law is the law, and in order that I might avoid actually getting arrested and/or frogmarched out of my offices (because Wisconsin Democrats have gigantic balls, unlike the Dems during the Bush years), I, Governor Deadeyes, will compromise by doing what I have to do anyway. In this way, both sides truly do win.

Also, this noise:

But Republican leaders again accused Sumi of interfering with the Legislature.

"Once again, one Dane County judge is doing everything she can to stand in the way of our efforts to improve the economy and create jobs," said Senate Majority Leader Scott Fitzgerald, R-Juneau. "This is judicial activism at its worst."

Someone on Twitter (please, introduce yourself, because I don't want to take credit for thinking of this) suggested Walker's next move would be to defund the judiciary, and I seriously would not be surprised if he and Fitzgerald managed to find a way. If it's not clear by now that there's nothing they wouldn't do, I don't know what could make it clearer. There's no veneer of civility here, as I said in comments to Scout's excellent find from yesterday: This is what they're like, under that skin of politeness that keeps them getting invited to parties. This is who they are under their skins.

A.

Wait. I Know This One.

Apparently it's not a law again:

Dane County DA Ismael Ozanne late this afternoon asked a judge to declare legislation changing collective bargaining powers for public employees is not law.

Ozanne filed additional documents in his complaint now before Dane County Judge Maryann Sumi, who earlier this month issued an injunction prohibiting the secretary of state from publishing legislation including the guv's austerity measures for public employees.

The Legislative Reference Bureau published the act on Friday, prompting Republicans and Gov. Scott Walker to declare the legislation law and being implementing the changes.

Wisconsin lately is like a teeny tiny little America from 2002, like a tiny, adorable terrarium version of all that illegal carnage and nonsense that went on in which people said reality wasn't reality and everybody watching them went, "... the hell?" and then they all went out to dinner together. 

A.

No Fly On The Fly

I don't know about y'all but I'm deeply conflicted about the Libyan intervention. Gaddafi, however you spell his name, is indeed a bloodthirsty lunatic and I wouldn't shed any tears if his tent got hit by a tomahawk missle. BUT the way this whole thing came down is way too haphazard for my taste.One day everyone was obsessed with Japan and the next day we're bombing Libya. The rebels did appear to be on the verge of losing but at the risk of sounding like Paul Newman as Butch Cassidy, "who are these guys?" Beats the hell out of me. They're a leaderless bunch of guys who shoot guns in the air every time there are teevee cameras around. I hope Richard Engel doesn't get hit in the head with a stray bullet. Yo, Richard, maybe you oughta come home and write a book and let some other bastard get shot at. 

I am usually NOT a process person but the way this happened doesn't sit well with me. It seems to have been driven by two pols who are very unpopular at home right now: President Sarko and Prime Minister Posh Boy. But now that the operation is underway, guess who's in the lead? In the immortal words of Bob Newhart, "that, that, that would be us." The mere fact that the President feels it necessary to say that our leadership role will last "days not weeks" makes me nervous. We've been on this slippery slope before and I'm not alone in having war fatigue. 

I believe the Obama Administration's intentions are good: they don't want to see an humanitarian disaster on the scale of Bosnia occur on their watch. (Btw, I think that phrase should be retired but I'm using it in honor of Jude the Submariner) BUT good intentions are NOT sufficient. After watching the Bushies give Wilsonian internationalism a right wing twist, I'm a born again realist in matters of war and peace. If it's in our national interest to use violence, I'm willing to hold my nose and hope for the best. In this instance, however, I'm inclined to agree with Josh Marshall who ended a very strong post as follows:

So let's review: No clear national or even humanitarian interest for military intervention. Intervening well past the point where our intervention can have a decisive effect. And finally, intervening under circumstances in which the reviled autocrat seems to hold the strategic initiative against us. This all strikes me as a very bad footing to go in on.

And this doesn't even get us to this being the third concurrent war in a Muslim nation and the second in an Arab one. Or the fact that the controversial baggage from those two wars we carry into this one, taking ownership of it, introducing a layer of 'The West versus lands of Islam' drama to this basically domestic situation and giving Qaddafi himself or perhaps one of his sons the ability to actually start mobilization some public or international opinion against us.

I can imagine many of the criticisms of the points I've made. And listening to them I think I'd find myself agreeing in general with a lot of it. But it strikes me as a mess, poorly conceived, ginned up by folks with their own weird agendas, carried out at a point well past the point that it was going to accomplish anything. Just all really bad.

Like Josh, I *really* hope I'm wrong about this because I'd love to see that murderous brown clad shitbird Gaddafi toppled. But the way they've gone about this gives me the heebie jeebies. I think they should have drafted Silvio Berlusconi to go down and hang with his boy Muammar and talk him down when the latter is all mellow after a bunga-bunga party.  That's what Dr. House would do, after all. Holy crap, did I just invoke Hugh Laurie's lunatic teevee doctor as having the prescription for world peace? Hookers and House, hookers and Berlusconi, hookers and Gaddafi. Bunga-bunga instead of bongo fury or something like that...

Yeah, I know war isn't funny but the absurdity of the situation cries out for mockery. I blame it on Joseph Heller: at a formative age I read Catch-22 far too many times for my own good. I've always identified with Yossarian's absurdist view of war. I'll leave sincerity to Nately and the Bush gang. Hmm, I wonder who Nately's whore was in the Bush era? But I digress,..

Despite my Catch-22 fixation, for many years I was something of a do-gooder when it came to international affairs. I thought that, in some circumstances, the good guys should intervene to protect people from dictators. It was, after alll, *one* of the reasons we fought against the Nazis. Then, I took a very interesting course in human rights law at Tulane Law School. It was taught by a visiting professor, Tom Farer, who is an expert in the field and a very entertaining prof to boot. The funnier the teacher, the more I learn. Surprised? I thought not.

The final exam was an eye opener: Farer created several scenarios involving military intervention in the name of human rights. It made me realize that while there *are* bad guys and there *is* evil in the world, it is very, very hard to use force in support of human rights. It sounds all righteous and noble but people still get killed, war is unpredictable and shit always goes wrong. Always.

I hope these ramblings made sense: other than spell checking, I applied no polish and just let 'er rip. (I guess that qualifies as a run-on sentence alert.) I am deeply conflicted about this latest episode as well as suffering from a nearly terminal case of war fatigue. Sometimes, I just wanna crawl under the covers and hide. In the end, all I can do is cross my fingers and hope that somebody takes out Gaddafi pronto so Sarko and the Posh Boy can thump their chests and get back to being deeply unpopular. I know nobody's going to take my advice about Silvio, Muammar and bunga-bunga but it would be less costly in lives and treasure.

Time to move on?

Whoever said “Time heals all wounds” never was wounded in a profound enough fashion.

If Governor Deadeyes thinks for a moment that, as the Journal Sentinel proclaimed, “Walker Wins,” he’s sorely mistaken. Even if his ramshackle approach to his ill-gotten gains against public unions holds up in court, he’s condemned himself to a life on the defensive. Four years is a short time to be in office and a long time to weather a storm.

His press conference on Thursday was enough to give me hives. He talked about the “dirty trick” the Democrats played by fleeing the state. He kept referencing his “legal experts” who told him he could do this. (Apparently, the son of a Baptist preacher never called on that upbringing to ask if this was a moral thing.) In the end, he retained his smirk and his sense of righteousness as he strode away from the podium.

His arrogance offends me. His failure to fully grasp what he’s doing gives me an emotional and visceral response that no words can adequately capture.

This isn’t a “we agree to disagree” outcome. This is a pure and unadulterated attack on the very fabric of who we are and how we approach our governance. His lack of understanding that things will not move forward in an organized and proficient manner smacks of an ignorance that no level of schooling or quality of upbringing could cure. It’s akin to the man who is zipping up after committing a sexual assault and asking the still quivering and crying victim, “So, we’re still on for dinner tomorrow night, right?”

The overriding theme that came from the nightly news out here was that it’s “time to move on.” In other words, “You plucky little hippies have had your moment of drum beating. Now it’s time to move past this.” The people who were calling for us to “move on” were citing the “extensive” and “exhausting” nature of this battle.

Folks, it’s been 25 days. It’s not the fucking 100 Years War.

It’s so easy to call for us to “move on” when you’re not the one being moved on from. When it’s not your pension or your rights or your life that is being impacted, it’s so much easier for people to say “let’s move on.” I’m sure seeing this instead of stories about how the spring melt is revealing green grass can be so taxing to all you viewers out there.

When you figure your side has claimed the day, calling for people to “move on” is the adult way of saying, “Neener, neener, NEEEE-NERRR! I WON I WON I WON!”

When you are impacted by this or if you have a soul, it’s a lot harder to do. When you know the people, when you see the stakes and when you understand that kicking a union official in the balls doesn’t get you off unemployment, you know better than to “move on.”

Something tells me more people will be stepping up instead of moving on.

Special Dispensation, Freedom of Information and Thuggery

 

“I think I was troubled at the time that my church kept changing rules. How can they change a rule anytime they want to? This law is eternal… Except for this weekend! SPECIAL DISPENSATION!”

George Carlin’s classic riff on his problems with the Catholic Church can easily apply to the state of Wisconsin this morning. On a brisk Ash Wednesday night, they forsook the “do unto other” line that so many of these people view as part of their underlying faith and screwed unions mercilessly. If you’ve been following this, you knew it was coming, but the irony of how it was done was something to behold.

Start with late last week when two media outlets sued the governor over his failure to abide by the state’s Freedom of Information law. The Isthmus and the Associated Press had requested all of his email regarding the “overwhelming support” he was receiving regarding his budget repair bill. He refused to acknowledge the requests for more than a week, despite constant pestering by the outlets that filed them. Finally, he offered $31,250 answer to one and ignored the other. This from the guy who claimed he'd be the most transparent governor we ever had...

Upon being sued, the governor’s legal team first chalked the failure to act as “a clerical oversight” (Read: we blew it off) and they offered to allow the two media outlets to come to Walker’s office and review the emails on the office’s computers. The people in the governor’s office had “helpfully” sorted the emails into “pro” and “con” folders, in which 46,124 were labeled for the bill and 7,349 were labeled against it. The journalists said this approach was untenable, and thus pushed forward on the suit.

In court, Walker’s counsel argued that the court would need to enact a balancing test on each and every email. They also claimed that this would take a long time because of the 125,000 emails that had been received. (Even if you’re not a college graduate, you can probably do simple math. Look at the numbers above and ask if those numbers add up to 125,000. Something’s not right here.) Even more, the counsel was said to have argued that many of the emails hadn’t even been read at this point, which begs the questions a) why not? And b) so how do you know that you’ve got way more support than opposition in your In Box? The judge, seeing this argument for what it was, pushed past this and allowed the suit to continue.

(One of the more interesting angles that’s not being covered in the MSM is raised here, which notes that it’s unclear how many of those emails may have been Astroturfed. For those of you unfamiliar with that concept, here’s a link. In short, it’s a tactic used by political groups (read: usually wingnuts) to tell people who generally support an idea how to send a note, where to send it and how to write it. It’s a fake grassroots campaign, usually sponsored by people with mone. In many cases, they’re pretty helpful. They even write the WHOLE LETTER FOR YOU. So much for thinking for yourself…)

What makes this worse is that as Walker is arguing about the sanctity of his email and his concerns about not releasing info until this business is “done,” he then actually complied with a similar FOIA request made by the Milwaukee Journal-Sentinel. In that request, the emails he provided showed his “willingness” to bend on several union-related issues. Presupposing that all of the documents were released (a 6:5 bet if I ever saw one), the documents paint the governor in the most flattering light possible. In other words: The LAW is the LAW (but only if I want to abide by it.)

Taking a page from the playbook of their Idiot-in-Chief, the Republicans rammed through union-crushing legislation last night a session that was shorter than the last installment of The Godfather trilogy. In order to get around the sticky wicket that the Democrats had placed in front of them, they stripped out as many financial provisions from a bill as they could and then stripped away collective bargaining rights from state workers. Not all of them, but enough of them to help convince themselves this was no longer a budget bill.

In justifying his party's actions, Senate Majority Leader Scott Fitzgerald said that “common sense” prevailed in this and that it was the Democrats who forced this measure. “(Democrats) said it was wrong to use a procedural/tactical maneuver to vote, despite the fact that they’re using a procedural/tactical maneuver to avoid the vote in Illinois,” his statement noted. In other words, “It’s wrong of you to do this shitty Illinois thing. Thus, we will do something even shittier to prove to you that we are above you.”

Keep in mind, these are the people who had been bitching about the law, the law and the law. They are also the ones complaining about the "thuggery" of unions and such. The Republicans pushed this to the point of attempting to have their colleagues arrested to compel them to show up and vote, as they believe the state Constitution allows.

However, in hosting this “Midnight Run” –style meeting, they failed to give 24 hours advance notice, which is required by law and essentially had no official hearing for the public (another similar issue). In addition, there's this tidbit:

After the session, Senate Republicans scattered, leaving no one to explain how they managed to pass components of the bill that seemed to have a fiscal impact, including changes in pensions and benefits, without the 20 senators needed to vote on fiscal matters.

So either they’re opposed to law breaking or they aren’t. They condemn the use of Machiavellian maneuvers or the use them themselves.

Or did they just have special dispensation?

Freedom. Information. Scott Walker. Which one of these is not like the other?

Over the past month or so, Governor Deadeyes has been spinning a narrative in which he’s been receiving “overwhelming” support for his budget-slashing measures. He has frequently cited receiving emails from “a single mother” or “a small-business owner” or “a laid off autoworker from Janesville.” As he continues to find ways to get on to TV to make his case, he keeps relying on this “overwhelming” support.

In an attempt to find out what level of support he really has received, two local media outlets filed Freedom of Information Act requests, seeking the emails that Walker has received over this period of time. They want to see exactly who is supporting him and what they are saying.

Apparently, the law not being on his side, Walker decided to ignore the requests. Bill Lueders of the Isthmus noted that he had not received a formal response to his request. AP reporter Todd Richmond received an email from the governor’s lawyer, noting his request would cost more than $31,250 and that amount of money had to be paid in advance. Or, he could just come on down and camp out at the Capitol and read until his heart was content.

The men filed a suit in Dane County on Friday, as their requests weren’t being taken seriously.

The Freedom of Information Act for the state of Wisconsin is listed here. Note that it says that we’re supposed to have as much openness as possible. Also note that fees can be waived “if the material requested is of public interest.” Governor might be making shit up? Yeah, seems like this request fits the bill

The law also dictates that a formal response is required and best practices in this state indicate that it’s supposed to come within 48 hours of receiving the request. A “hey dude” email a week later doesn’t cut it.

Furthermore, the costs associated with the FOIA are not meant to be prohibitive or punitive. Really bad government officials use the “reasonable costs” provisions of FOIA to attempt to dissuade people from getting their grubby little paws on certain records. If you extrapolate the printing cost of about a quarter per page, Walker apparently received 125,000 pages of emails. Possible? Sure.

However, Lueders asked for them on a disk of some kind, thus eliminating the need for copying costs. In fact, for about ten bucks, you can get a jump drive and just get the crap transferred over. For about a buck or two, you can get a CD and just burn it down. Not hard. Not expensive. Clearly not the way the state wants to go.

For all this talk about waylaying the Constitution of the state by having Democrats in Illinois or letting some dirty little union thugs use painters tape in the Capitol, it seems that the only law the governor likes is when he gets to apply it and enforce it.

The purpose of FOIA is to allow the actions of our elected officials see the light of day as to create a more informed citizenry. Denying access to governmental records keeps us in the dark.

Right where Scott Walker wants us.

I Heart Dave Mahoney

Hell yeah, sheriff:

Mahoney said he believes law enforcement and public safety is being jeopardized by the restrictions.

"I am confident having talked with our staff on the Capitol grounds that we still have a peaceful demonstration. But it's crucial that individuals have a voice and access to their lawmakers," Mahoney said.

The deputies had been told that the doors would be open at 8 a.m. yesterday, but that didn't happen and the officers didn't find out why until the afternoon, Mahoney said.

"When asked to stand guard at the doors that duty was turned over to the Wisconsin State Patrol because our deputies would not stand and be palace guards," Mahoney said. "I refused to put deputy sheriffs in a position to be palace guards."

Reminds me of a line from the West Wing: Mr. President, in the event of a coup what makes you think the Secret Service will be on your side?

The behavior of the cops over the past couple of weeks really has been extraordinary. Not just the state and Madison-area police; cops have come from all over either to pitch in with extra work guarding the Capitol or to take part in the protests themselves as supporters. And before Monday, they were mostly standing there either taking pictures, posing for pictures, waving to little kids at the ongoing DemocracyFest, or generally behaving like all of this was no big deal.

Which is important. The message that conveyed to protesters was that they didn't have to be pissed at the cops, they didn't have to yell or try to exceed the limits the cops set. People generally do what is expected of them, and everything in law enforcement's demeanor said, "We expect there to be no trouble and for you to keep having a good time while doing your thing." They weren't tense, so nobody else was either. Then came Monday, and yesterday, and this:

Photo from Scout.

People are still being calm, but now they have to set limits that aren't reasonable, and wall people off from where people know they have a legal right to be, and good on Dave Mahoney for pointing out how much that sucks. For the officers, and everybody else.

A.

On Wisconsin: 'This is too big to ignore'

The Wisconsin Capitol is a beautiful building.

Schoolchildren and bus tourists gawk at it. I take friends who come with me to Madison there, and they walk its marble halls and ornate staircases and stand in the splended rotunda and stare up, up, up, four and five and six stories up, all the way up to the golden dome and echoing heights of the top of the ceiling. The few times I did any reporting in the statehouse, I wondered how anyone could simply think of it as an office, or a place of business, and become used to the sights and sounds within, and not feel awe. On any day of the year, it is a beautiful building.

On Sunday, it was magnificent.

Some people had rededorated it, you see. They'd hung a small sign in one dark corner: "Home Sweet Home." In another, "Madison 14: We Thank You." A woman with a baby in a stroller circled on the second floor, her hand-lettered shirt reading, "I do not work for the state. I do support the unions." Around and around and around the marble railings, people proclaimed their home towns, their affiliations, their passions: Sauk Prairie Teachers. UW Department of Geography. People of Color Supporting Freedom.

Protesters were fighting to retain the rights of organized labor everywhere, now under siege by the newly elected governor and Republican legislature. Democratic state senators fled the state, avoiding a quorum call on the governor's budget bill, and in their absence the citizens of the state decided to move in. Some carried instruments, a flute, a drum. Others pounded on plastic buckets. A child banged a pot lid and sleigh bell together. "What's disgusting?" they called out during a lull in the music.

"UNION BUSTING!"

Upstairs, in a steamy hearing room, people packed the seats and sat on the floor as Democratic members of the state assembly took testimony, hour after hour.

Library student Alison Gerherd wore scrubs and carried a sign to support her roommate, a CNA who works in a nursing home, caring for the very old and very ill. "She has done things you can't imagine, for $15 an hour," Gerherd told Democratic Rep. Mark Pocan, her voice trembling. "To disrespect someone who cares for others like that just isn't right."

Republican Governor Scott Walker's budget bill, SB 11, would strip collective bargaining rights away from unions that have had such rights for decades. Not without going through Gerherd,  who has been protesting since Monday. 

"I have been here every day and I will be here every day until this is over," she said. "I am not going away. None of us are."

Down in the rotunda, the drumming began again, so loud it could be felt in vibrations in the walls. "Tell me what democracy looks like!"

"THIS IS WHAT DEMOCRACY LOOKS LIKE!"

Mary Hughes-Greer's 89-year-old mother didn't want her child going out in the rain. Not on a bus, anyway, not all the way from Beloit in the cold. But Hughes-Greer needed to disobey her mother in order to honor her.

Her mother taught school in Racine's Unified School district during brutal strikes in the 1970s. Before that, she demonstrated for civil rights, instilling in her daughter a lifelong compassion for others and a bedrock belief in social justice.

"I remember walking around this same square with my mother for civil rights, and this is about civil rights," she said. "We don't need to take people's rights away. We don't need to divide people. We succeed by coming together and having hope, not by taking hope away."

Down in the rotunda, protesters carried signs decrying Walker not only for his move against the unions, but for his extreme right-wing views in general, and especially as enshrined in the bill. "Dread Scott," one sign read. "FORWARD: Our State Motto 1848. BACKWARD: Our State Motto 2011," read another. "Whose house?" people called.

"OUR HOUSE!" 

In the hearing room, Sam Kellerman leaned forward into the microphone and read part of the governor's bill aloud:

"16.765 (1) Contracting agencies, the University of Wisconsin Hospitals and Clinics Authority, the Fox River Navigational System Authority, the Wisconsin Aerospace Authority, the Health Insurance Risk−Sharing Plan Authority, the Lower Fox River Remediation Authority, the Wisconsin Quality Home Care Authority, the Wisconsin Economic Development Corporation, and the Bradley Center Sports and Entertainment Corporation shall include in all contracts executed by them a provision obligating the contractor not to discriminate against any employee or applicant for employment because of age, race, religion, color, handicap, sex, physical condition, developmental disability as defined in s. 51.01 (5), sexual orientation as defined in s. 111.32 (13m), or national origin and, except with respect to sexual orientation, obligating the contractor to take affirmative action to ensure equal employment opportunities."

"Except with respect to sexual orientation," he repeated, his voice shaking. "They have to take action to ensure equal opportunities ... unless you are gay. I am appalled that this state would discriminate against my mother, because she chooses to love my other mother."

As the hearing room rang with applause, he leaned over to his mom, sitting next to him, and folded her into a hug. Out in the hallway, they both wiped away tears.

"I have no intention of backing down from this," he said. "We're going to privatize the state and encourage private contractors to recruit, but not gay people, because they couldn't possibly have anything to contribute."

The governor will formally introduce his budget to the state on March 1. Kellerman said he'd already requested the day off from work so he could be in the streets or the halls of the Capitol, demonstrating with others who believed, as he did, that the state belonged to the public. "This is too big," he said, "to ignore."

Down in the rotunda, a woman carried a large sign. "WE ARE THE REAL CITIZENS UNITED."

"Kill the bill!" protesters shouted. "Kill the bill!"

A.

Update 2/23: Reader CE, who comes with credible legal expertise, writes in that the language excluding gays from protection in hiring isn't new, and that the bill does not change existing law in this regard:

If you read the section that Mr. Kellerman was referring to, the only actual proposed change to the law is that there is an Agency that is being excluded (for whatever reason) from the policies that currently govern the rest of the State's hiring practices.  Otherwise this entire section simply reprints the law as it currently exists.  The State of Wisconsin has never had an affirmative action hiring practice for LGBT applicants.  Whether or not one thinks we should is a discussion for another day.